All My Colors

by David Quantick Narrated by Chris Andrew Ciulla

Overview

From Emmy-award winning author David Quantick, All My Colors is a darkly comic novel about a man who remembers a book that may not exist, with dire consequences. A bizarre, mind-bending story at the intersection of Richard Bachman, Charlie Kaufman, and Franz Kafka.

It is March 1979 in DeKalb Illinois. Todd Milstead is a wannabe writer, a serial adulterer, and a jerk, only tolerated by his friends because he throws the best parties with the best booze. During one particular party, Todd is showing off his perfect recall, quoting poetry and literature word for word plucked from his eidetic memory. When he begins quoting from a book no one else seems to know, a novel called All My Colors, Todd is incredulous. He can quote it from cover to cover and yet it doesn't seem to exist.

With a looming divorce and mounting financial worries, Todd finally tries to write a novel, with the vague idea of making money from his talent. The only problem is he can't write. But the book-All My Colors-is there in his head. Todd makes a decision: he will "write" this book that nobody but him can remember. After all, if nobody's heard of it, how can he get into trouble?

As the dire consequences of his actions come home to both Todd and his long-suffering friends, it becomes clear that there is a high-and painful-price to pay for his crime.

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

David Quantick is one of the best kept secrets in the world of writing. He’s smart, funny and unique. You should let yourself in on the secret.”
—Neil Gaiman

“Wonderfully bizarre . . . as a twisty and fitfully funny episode of The Twilight Zone, it’s a blast. A caustic, unexpected comic horror story in which the villain, as always, thinks he's the hero.”
—Kirkus Reviews

“All My Colors is by turns a supernatural revenge fantasy, a black comedy, and a self-abnegating parody. It is hysterical, shocking, and propulsive—leave the lights on for its end.”
—Foreword Magazine

“Quantick ably sketches an unappealing but interesting protagonist swiftly out of his depth, and the slowly unfolding literary menace will appeal to fans of Jonathan Carroll’s The Land of Laughs (1980) or of literary-themed horror in general.”
—Booklist

“With his witty, cautionary horror story, David Quantick entertains readers from start to finish: he turns his sharp eye on the dynamics of publishing industry in a novel that explores the nature of story-telling itself. Fast-paced and easy to read, this novel is a must-read for fans of Chuck Palahniuk, Drew Magary and John Niven.”
—Mystery Tribune

“Part mystery, part fantasy, All My Colors’ rainbow of sensations won’t leave readers unfazed.”
—BookPage

“Quantick spins the tired trope of a book about someone writing a book into a darkly humorous story about ego and comeuppance, one that, for a moment, lets the reader believe in a just world where jerks get their due punishment.”
—Barnes & Noble SFF Blog

“Too many novels about fictional stories do a terrible job of convincing the reader that the subject matter is actually worthwhile: this is one of those rare books that creates a wholly convincing novel on which to hang its plot.”
—The Frumious Consortium

“ . . . cut through with a Jordan Peele-esque level of social satire.”
—Ravenous Monster

Kirkus Reviews

2019-02-04

A wannabe writer who's a real jerk writes a bestseller in an eerie fashion.

There's been a wealth of spooky comic-horror novels in recent years, and this wonderfully bizarre entry from multimedia scribe and Emmy Award-winning Veep writer Quantick (Go West, 2019, etc.) definitely fits the bill. Set in 1979 in a small town in rural Illinois, the book concerns one Todd Milstead, an aspiring writer who is introduced in the first line as "an asshole" and is later described by one of the handful of people who actually like him as a "pompous, vain, arrogant, self-obsessed, rude bastard." He drinks too much, cheats on his wife, lectures his friends, and generally behaves as described. While the character himself is deeply unpleasant, it's worth reading to the end of Quantick's deceptive puzzle-box of a novel. The biggest change in Todd's life comes when he uses his eidetic memory to copy word for word a now-obscure 1966 bestselling novel called All My Colors by a writer named Jake Turner. To Todd's surprise, his copy of the novel, which he's published under his own name, becomes a runaway hit. The middle sags a bit with a painfully accurate portrayal of a book tour, but Quantick gives away just enough strangeness amid Todd's perpetual breakdown to keep the reader going. Following a divorce, Todd hires a seedy private eye to follow his ex-wife and her new lover, who doesn't seem to appear in photographs. Two of his friends die under mysterious circumstances, and Todd himself is stalked by an enigmatic biker, not to mention the weight of his own guilt over his massive duplicity and the certainty that he's sure to get caught. As a satire of the writing life, it's less effective, but as a twisty and fitfully funny episode of The Twilight Zone, it's a blast.

A caustic, unexpected comic horror story in which the villain, as always, thinks he's the hero.

Product Details

BN ID:	2940169525465
Publisher:	Blackstone Audio, Inc.
Publication date:	04/16/2019
Edition description:	Unabridged

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