Everything was perfect, until it wasn't. Joy filled every cell of my body, only to have anguish drive it away. Two weeks from my due date, a few hours after a blood test suggested smooth sailing, I began to bleed profusely. I realized my unborn son was in grave danger. I realized my life was endangered as well. Arthur, the boy I knew so well and yet not at all, was born still, driving a stake through my heart. I was saved on the operating table.
What mother wouldn't trade places: take me, spare him? And, when the bargain can't be made, how does a mother reconcile that harsh, everlasting torment? I had to lean hard on others. I had to rekindle my faith. I had to find a purpose to lead me out of the darkness, and Arthur shined the light.