Babyproofing Your Marriage: How to Laugh More and Argue Less As Your Family Grows

by Stacie Cockrell, Cathy O'Neill, Julia Stone, Rosario Camacho-Koppel

Overview

The Babyproofers are three women who wouldn't trade their roles as mothers for anything, and they love their husbands deeply. But after living through it and hearing the stories of hundreds of other couples, they know that with young children in the house, you need to block the stairs with baby gates, put plastic covers over the outlets, AND take the necessary steps to safeguard your marriage.

Babyproofing Your Marriage is the warts-and-all truth about how having children can affect your relationship. The transition to parenthood can be a tough adjustment for any couple, but the good news is: you are not alone. Better yet, there are hundreds of simple but effective ways you can stay connected as husband and wife and still be good parents. The authors' evenhanded approach to both sides of the marital equation allows spouses to understand each other in a whole new way. With loads of humor, compassion, and practical advice, the Babyproofers will guide first-time parents and veterans alike around the rocky shores of the early parenting years.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780061173554
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	02/05/2008
Edition description:	Reprint
Pages:	304
Sales rank:	631,208
Product dimensions:	5.31(w) x 8.00(h) x 0.68(d)

About the Author

Stacie Harris Cockrell graduated from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and went on to receive her MBA from the University of Texas. After graduate school, she was a finance and marketing professional at Dell Inc. and subsequently co-founded a high tech company in Austin, Texas. She currently resides in Austin with her husband, Ross, and their three children.

Cathy O'Neill is from Dublin, Ireland. She moved to the United States, after a five-year transatlantic relationship, to marry her husband, Mike. Cathy is an attorney who now works as a management consultant. She lives in Austin, Texas and has two children.

Julia Stone is a Texas native and a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania. She also holds an MBA from the University of Texas. Julia is a former product manager in the educational services field turned full-time mom. She currently lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, Gordon, and their two sons.

Table of Contents

How Did We Get Here? Parenthood Changes Everything     1
Baby ... Boom! Welcome to the Foxhole     13
What's the Score? The Post-Baby Battle of the Sexes     57
The "Sex Life" of New Parents: Coitus Non-Existus     111
In-Laws and Outlaws: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly     157
Ramping Up and Giving In: More Kids, More Chaos     194
Balancing Priorities: Where Do We Go From Here?     241
Epilogue: So, Did We Learn Anything?     271
Acknowledgments     275
Glossary of Terms     277
Endnotes     287

Editorial Reviews

Do you suffer from Mommy Brain? According to the authors, this all-too-common condition afflicts women whose craniums are cluttered with schedules, carpooling logistics, a toddler's troubling cough, summer camp options, and so many other kid-related issues that they have no mental room for their husbands. Babyproofing Your Marriage identifies symptoms and cures for M.B. and numerous other mommy maladies. Recommended pregnancy reading.

In this feisty treatise, three mothers with seven kids between them team up to do their own research on the state of marriage after children. Though their admittedly "pseudo-scientific" research seems to have come mainly from interviewing friends, family and people on the street, they arrive at some reasonable solutions to how couples can keep their marriages fresh and stimulating amid armloads of dirty diapers and screeching babies. While they explore the division of labor, parental exhaustion and how to juggle the grandparents, the focal chapter is on sex; the three authors attempt to address the problem of how to keep men satisfied when, at the end of the day, their wives want nothing to do with them ("coitus non-existus"). Moms' lack of interest isn't surprising, the authors maintain, given that women do the lion's share of managing the house and kids, often in addition to working outside the home. Though the authors claim to be fair and balanced, they frequently give clueless fathers a tongue-lashing with some great one-liners (e.g., "pitch in if you want her to put out"). The bottom line is that the more child care and domestic chores the guys do, the better their sex lives and the marriage in general. Instead of score keeping, the authors steer couples toward ways to appreciate one another. And if all else fails to solve a marital issue, as they point out in this frank and funny book, there's always rock, paper scissors. (Feb.) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.

Publishers Weekly

That two-thirds of couples with young children are very unhappy with their marriages makes these advice books timely and useful. In Babyproofing, the lighter of the two, young wives, mothers, and friends Cockrell, Cathy O'Neill, and Julia Stone share their experiences and collective wisdom. Their work reads like Vicki Iovine's popular "Girlfriends' Guide" series-chatty, engaging, and full of firsthand advice. Chapters cover common issues, e.g., divvying up tasks, handling changes in sexual activity, and dealing with grandparents while also offering "Solutions," usually divided into "For Both," "For Women," and "For Men"; most chapters have "How Women Feel" and "How Men Feel" sections. For those who prefer scientific research and solutions, And Baby Makes Three offers a more clinical approach to fortifying a marriage once a baby enters the picture. Psychologists John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman (coauthors, Ten Lessons To Transform Your Marriage) wrote this volume based on their studies of parents and the results of a "Bringing Baby Home" program they have developed for new and expecting parents. Beyond just citing research studies and statistics, the Gottmans provide readers with self-tests and detailed exercises for examining and resolving particular issues within their own marriages. The psychological terminology may make the text daunting for some readers, but the applications are wonderfully practical and specific. Furthermore, the book offers more detail than does Babyproofing, e.g., the analysis of conflict is broken down into nine brief chapters. Ultimately, the Gottmans' work is so practical that it will apply to all married readers, whether or not they are raising children. Larger public libraries, especially those with dedicated parenting sections, should purchase both books; smaller libraries should purchase only the Gottmans' work.-Erica L. Foley, Flint P.L., MI Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.

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