Table of Contents
1 I Knew I Should Have Worn Underwear to Church l
2 The Age of Innocence 7
3 Sister Jenny 11
4 I Want to Be a Jew! 17
5 I'm Totally Possessed by the Devil, Like Totally 25
6 Jenny's First Fall from Grace 35
7 Stay Home and Make It a Godbuster Night 43
8 Jesus's Baby Mama 47
9 Like a Virgin 51
10 If Gluttony Is Evil, Why Are So Many Catholics Alcoholics? 57
11 Monkey See, Monkey Do 65
12 GOD: Thou Shalt Not Have Strange Gods Before Me. JENNY: I'm Cool with That But… Who Are You? 73
13 Jesus Was My Justin Bieber 79
14 GOD: Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Goods. JENNY But What If My Neighbor's Shit Is Really, Really Awesome? 85
15 The Purpose of Lent? I Give Up 95
16 Girls Gone Wild 99
17 O Holy Night 111
18 Can Someone Kill Our Dog, Please? 119
19 Leap of Faith 125
20 PRIEST: You Sold Your Soul to the Devil! JENNY: And I Gave It to Him Half Price! 131
21 I'm Losing My Religion… Just Like R.E.M. 145
22 I See Dead People 153
23 There Is Only So Much Bleach a Girl Can Take 165
24 Oh No, My Mom Is Going to Hell! 171
25 Belly Cries to Belly Laughs 173
26 Aho Mitakuye Oyasin 181
27 Curious Jenny and the Man in the Big White Hat 187
28 Step Away from the Vicodin and Sit on the Toilet 201
29 Losing My Identity 207
30 Evan's Chapter 215
31 Recovering Catholic 217
32 Finding My State of Grace 221
Acknowledgments 223