Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire
Welcome to the world of Gary Yordon—former politician, part-time television host, and accidental newspaper columnist. When Yordon's world began giving him stories too good not to immortalize, he sent one to a friend at a newspaper. Two years and seventy-five columns later, he had a rabidly loyal readership. Their persistent requests led to this collection.

There is nothing above Yordon's satire, including his lack of home repair skills, addiction to Steven Seagal movies, and kidney stone intolerance. (Okay, maybe Yordon is normal in that regard.) He admits to actively resisting the temptation to write excessively about his mother, who is "a living, breathing, Neil Simon play."

"My ninety-year-old mother is a fierce shopper. Put a parachute on sale and Mom's all over it because it's not about need, it's about price. She'd buy a show pony to get a free harness. She passed the shopping gene to me. If I hear the phrase 'as seen on TV,' I know I'm in trouble. At 3 a.m., the Leopard Print Cat Tunnel for $19.95 is too good to pass up. Now all I need is a cat."

Tender moments are tucked away in this book too, especially those related to Yordon's relationship with his profoundly challenged son, Zachary.

Learn more about Gary Yordon at ZPRgroup.com.
"1125141601"
Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire
Welcome to the world of Gary Yordon—former politician, part-time television host, and accidental newspaper columnist. When Yordon's world began giving him stories too good not to immortalize, he sent one to a friend at a newspaper. Two years and seventy-five columns later, he had a rabidly loyal readership. Their persistent requests led to this collection.

There is nothing above Yordon's satire, including his lack of home repair skills, addiction to Steven Seagal movies, and kidney stone intolerance. (Okay, maybe Yordon is normal in that regard.) He admits to actively resisting the temptation to write excessively about his mother, who is "a living, breathing, Neil Simon play."

"My ninety-year-old mother is a fierce shopper. Put a parachute on sale and Mom's all over it because it's not about need, it's about price. She'd buy a show pony to get a free harness. She passed the shopping gene to me. If I hear the phrase 'as seen on TV,' I know I'm in trouble. At 3 a.m., the Leopard Print Cat Tunnel for $19.95 is too good to pass up. Now all I need is a cat."

Tender moments are tucked away in this book too, especially those related to Yordon's relationship with his profoundly challenged son, Zachary.

Learn more about Gary Yordon at ZPRgroup.com.
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Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire

Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire

by Gary Yordon
Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire

Driving the Road of Life with a Flat Tire

by Gary Yordon

eBook

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Overview

Welcome to the world of Gary Yordon—former politician, part-time television host, and accidental newspaper columnist. When Yordon's world began giving him stories too good not to immortalize, he sent one to a friend at a newspaper. Two years and seventy-five columns later, he had a rabidly loyal readership. Their persistent requests led to this collection.

There is nothing above Yordon's satire, including his lack of home repair skills, addiction to Steven Seagal movies, and kidney stone intolerance. (Okay, maybe Yordon is normal in that regard.) He admits to actively resisting the temptation to write excessively about his mother, who is "a living, breathing, Neil Simon play."

"My ninety-year-old mother is a fierce shopper. Put a parachute on sale and Mom's all over it because it's not about need, it's about price. She'd buy a show pony to get a free harness. She passed the shopping gene to me. If I hear the phrase 'as seen on TV,' I know I'm in trouble. At 3 a.m., the Leopard Print Cat Tunnel for $19.95 is too good to pass up. Now all I need is a cat."

Tender moments are tucked away in this book too, especially those related to Yordon's relationship with his profoundly challenged son, Zachary.

Learn more about Gary Yordon at ZPRgroup.com.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781942645481
Publisher: Inkshares
Publication date: 11/29/2016
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: eBook
File size: 943 KB

About the Author

Gary Yordon is a 2016 National Society of Newspaper Columnists award winner. He authors a biweekly humor column for Gannett newspapers and hosts the popular CBS television political program The Usual Suspects.

Table of Contents

Foreword 1

Giant Snake 5

Car Windows 9

Near-Death Experience 13

Tears and Chick Flicks 17

Catfishing 21

Ghosts of John Denham 25

Kidney Stone 29

$150 Words 33

Kathy's Wazoo 37

Beyond Liquid-Plumr 41

Unfriendly Skies 45

Mom's Newfangled Phone 49

Stocked Cars and Tow Trucks 53

Adults Under Siege 57

Obits 61

Hammerhead 65

Blueberry Pancakes 69

A Christmas Miracle 73

Bridge Views 77

Dad's Recliner 81

Flu Shots and Turkey Melts 85

Rules from the How to Be a Man Handbook 89

Hot Pretzel 93

My Patient Teacher 97

Hearing Aids 101

Billy Lopp's Brilliant Idea 105

Bubble Art 109

Midlife Diet 113

Murder of Crows (or Why God Made Windows) 117

Passwords 121

Pork Vindaloo 125

The McTruth 129

My Secret Shame 133

No Joke 137

Pillow Speakers 141

Road Trip 145

The Google 149

Acknowledgments 153

About the Author 155

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