Every Note Played

by Lisa Genova Narrated by Dennis Boutsikaris, Dagmara Dominczyk

Overview

“Unsparing in her depiction of the disease's harrowing effects, neuroscientist Genova also celebrates humanity.” -People

“Sometimes it's easier to tell truth in fiction...And she tells it with heart and hope.” -NPR

“Her juxtaposition of scientific detail with compassionate, heartfelt storytelling is unparalleled.” -Bookreporter

“Every Note Played will grip and gut you.” -The Boston Globe

From neuroscientist and New York Times bestselling author of Still Alice comes a powerful exploration of regret, forgiveness, freedom, and what it means to be alive.

An accomplished concert pianist, Richard received standing ovations from audiences all over the world in awe of his rare combination of emotional resonance and flawless technique. Every finger of his hands was a finely calibrated instrument, dancing across the keys and striking each note with exacting precision. That was eight months ago.

Richard now has ALS, and his entire right arm is paralyzed. His fingers are impotent, still, devoid of possibility. The loss of his hand feels like a death, a loss of true love, a divorce-his divorce.

He knows his left arm will go next.

Three years ago, Karina removed their framed wedding picture from the living room wall and hung a mirror there instead. But she still hasn't moved on. Karina is paralyzed by excuses and fear, stuck in an unfulfilling life as a piano teacher, afraid to pursue the path she abandoned as a young woman, blaming Richard and their failed marriage for all of it.

When Richard becomes increasingly paralyzed and is no longer able to live on his own, Karina becomes his reluctant caretaker. As Richard's muscles, voice, and breath fade, both he and Karina try to reconcile their past before it's too late.

Poignant and powerful, Every Note Played is a masterful exploration of redemption and what it means to find peace inside of forgiveness.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

02/12/2018
Genova (Still Alice) captivates with the painful but unflinching story of the demise of celebrated concert pianist Richard Evans. The novel follows debonair Richard and his ex-wife Karina, once also a pianist, who have just undergone an acrimonious divorce after a long-poisoned marriage. Richard’s sudden diagnosis with ALS and swift decline bring them under the same roof again as Karina moves back to take care of him, forcing them to confront long-buried truths about their relationship and themselves. The narration alternates between Karina, the sometimes bitter, always stalwart caretaker, and Richard, the patient who has lost his physical abilities, but gained emotional clarity. Genova meticulously catalogues the disease’s physical ravages and corresponding psychological toll, which makes for gut-wrenching but suspenseful reading. The strained, frustrated, yet tender dynamic between Richard, Karina, and their grown daughter, Grace, occasionally spills into the saccharine, though the high emotion usually feels justified given the subject. The detail Genova infuses into each narrator’s thought process, observations, and love for music makes them distinct, yet also reveals their compatibility. Genova also admirably refrains from making either too angelic; their harrowing journey, though it lacks any true narrative surprises, is both substantively informative about ALS and an emotionally wrenching psychological portrait. (Apr.)

From the Publisher

Genova is far more serious and readable, concerned as much with depicting the clinical realities of ALS as in wringing it for emotional catharsis. You might drop a few tears reading Every Note Played but you won’t feel bullied into doing so.”
—The Wall Street Journal

"Only Lisa Genova could bring such honesty and grace to the war against ALS. Searing writing and a must-read."
—Helen Simonson, New York Times bestselling author of Major Pettigrew's Last Stand


“Genova captivates. Gut-wrenching but suspenseful reading... Both substantively informative about ALS and an emotionally wrenching psychological portrait.”
—Publishers Weekly

“[A] gripping novel... Unsparing in her depiction of the disease’s harrowing effects, neuroscientist Genova also celebrates humanity and the rewards of asking for, and offering, forgiveness.”
—PEOPLE

"Lisa Genova writes with humor and humanity but also with a scientist’s eye about the daily depredations of disease, the incremental losses, the slower acceptances, the rage, the love, the courage, and strangely enough, the joy. A nocturne of the soul. Read this book, read it all night, and wake up glad to alive."
—Bill Roorbach, author of Life Among Giants, The Remedy for Love, and The Girl of the Lake.

"Lisa Genova’s brilliant Every Note Played stapled me to the couch. Written with vivid honesty about the realities of ALS, for both patient and family, this novel goes far beyond drama or education—though Genova provides both. The powerful compassion in this book placed it on that rare list: one of the books I’ll remember forever."
—Randy Susan Meyers, author of The Widow of Wall Street

"Sometimes it’s easier to tell truth in fiction. Lisa Genova has made a career of it... She tells the tale of a piano virtuoso whose body begins to slowly weaken and fail due to the devastating disease. And she tells it with heart and hope."
—Kimberly Atkins, On Point

"At turns beautiful and brutal, Lisa Genova crafts a realistic and heartrending portrayal of a couple’s failed marriage in the midst of the husband’s battle with ALS. The emotions and intimacy conveyed are difficult to read, but impossible to ignore."
—BookBub

"Her juxtaposition of scientific detail with compassionate, heartfelt storytelling is unparalleled... [I]n true Genova fashion, Every Note Played is as full of hope as it is of heartbreak."
—BookReporter

"Somewhere Reese Witherspoon is learning how to pretend to play the piano, because I can easily see her starring in a film adaptation of this tug-on-the-heart-strings novel."
—Amazon Book Review

“Genova's latest is one of her strongest—more internalized... an eloquent and touching imagining of how a peaceful terminal place might be reached.”
—Kirkus Reviews

"Genova expertly details the devastation ALS wreaks on Richard, and though her latest is a sometimes difficult read, she finds hope in the opportunities Richard has to repair his relationships with his daughter and brothers before it’s too late."
—Booklist

"What’s amazing about her newest novel, Every Note Played, is what is amazing about all of Genova’s books. She is both the neuroscientist and the actor when she writes. She tells not only the story of a person struck down by some disease. She tells the story of the disease, too. And you learn this way. But it never feels like learning."
—The Boston Globe

"An expertly written depiction of the toll a ravaging disease takes on both the body and the heart."
—Marie Claire

"This book is especially remarkable because as a neuroscientist, author Lisa Genova has keen insight into the realities of ALS."
—Bustle

“[Lisa Genova] delivers another gripping journey through a dread disease in Every Note Played. This time she trains her masterful storytelling skills on ALS as it plays out in a fractured family... deft phrasing eases the reader’s passage through a story that can’t end happily.”
—Minneapolis Star Tribune

"Genova expertly explores regret, guilt and forgiveness as we witness the progression of this deadly disease."
—BookTrib

"Genova unsparingly details the tragedy of ALS. But she includes the beauty and joy of Richard and Karina's lives in music, balancing the horrific with the uplifting. Every Note Played is the story of a marriage, as well as a hard-hitting primer on a disease."
—Shelf Awareness, starred review

Booklist

"Genova expertly details the devastation ALS wreaks on Richard, and though her latest is a sometimes difficult read, she finds hope in the opportunities Richard has to repair his relationships with his daughter and brothers before it’s too late."

Randy Susan Meyers

"Lisa Genova’s brilliant Every Note Played stapled me to the couch. Written with vivid honesty about the realities of ALS, for both patient and family, this novel goes far beyond drama or education—though Genova provides both. The powerful compassion in this book placed it on that rare list: one of the books I’ll remember forever."

Bill Roorbach

"Lisa Genova writes with humor and humanity but also with a scientist’s eye about the daily depredations of disease, the incremental losses, the slower acceptances, the rage, the love, the courage, and strangely enough, the joy. A nocturne of the soul. Read this book, read it all night, and wake up glad to alive."

Helen Simonson

"Only Lisa Genova could bring such honesty and grace to the war against ALS. Searing writing and a must-read."

MARCH 2018 - AudioFile

Narrators Dennis Boutsikaris and Dagmara Dominczyk bring to life this compelling story of the impact of ALS on a patient and his caregivers. Boutsikaris gets inside the mind and spirit of Richard, a world-renowned pianist who is blindsided with his diagnosis at the height of his career. His voice runs the gamut from disbelief to depressed resignation. As the disease progresses, we hear in Boutsikaris’s voice the painful struggle as communication becomes more challenging. Dominczyk brings complicated layers of anger, regret, resentment, confusion, and love to the voice of estranged wife Karina. She gives Karina a detached but sad tone as she tries to come to terms with her responsibilities to this man she blames for her own regrets. N.E.M. Winner of AudioFile Earphones Award © AudioFile 2018, Portland, Maine

Kirkus Reviews

2018-01-23
"Demoralized, pathetic, emasculated, dying"—such is the state of a classical pianist afflicted by a fast-moving, incurable disease. But it's not the end of the story, rather the beginning of a parallel journey, in neuroscientist Genova's (Inside the O'Briens, 2015, etc.) fifth work of fiction.Having made her reputation with novels about Huntington's disease, autism, and, most famously, Alzheimer's—Still Alice (2009), which was turned into a movie with Julianne Moore—Genova now turns to the merciless degenerative disease amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. The unsuspecting sufferer is Richard Evans, a renowned musician for whom the irretrievable loss of muscle control begins with paralysis in his arms, denying him both the joy and life's purpose of playing music. But as important as Richard's career is, it's his emotional life to which the larger part of the book is devoted, specifically his failed marriage to Polish immigrant (and equally talented pianist) Karina, his distant relationship with his daughter, Grace, and his unresolved feelings toward his father, who never valued Richard's gift. While charting Richard's physical decline with her customary and precise mustering of medical symptoms, facts, treatments, and equipment, Genova appears equally interested in exploring the psychological ramifications of Richard's prognosis. In the limited time remaining to him, Richard and Karina need to find a way to apologize and forgive each other for their individual failings in the marriage; Grace needs to understand her father's regrets about his inadequate parenting; and Richard must come to terms with the damage his own father inflicted. Thus the novel has contrapuntal themes—the body's decline matched with a different struggle, toward psychic reconciliation for Richard, and Karina too.While undeniably formulaic, Genova's latest is one of her strongest—more internalized, sometimes slow, but an eloquent and touching imagining of how a peaceful terminal place might be reached.

Product Details

BN ID:	2940171034009
Publisher:	Simon & Schuster
Publication date:	03/20/2018
Edition description:	Unabridged

Read an Excerpt

Every Note Played

If Karina had grown up fifteen kilometers down the road in either direction north or south, in Gliwice or Bytom instead of Zabrze, her whole life would be different. Even as a child, she never doubted this. Location matters in destiny as much as it does in real estate.

In Gliwice, it was every girl’s birthright to take ballet. The ballet teacher there was Miss Gosia, a former celebrated prima ballerina for the Polish National Ballet prior to Russian martial law, and because of this, it was considered a perk to raise daughters in otherwise grim Gliwice, an unrivaled privilege that every young girl would have access to such an accomplished teacher. These girls grew up wearing leotards and buns and tulle-spun hopes of pirouetting their way out of Gliwice someday. Without knowing specifically what has become of the girls who grew up in Gliwice, she’s sure that most, if not all, remain firmly anchored where they began and are now schoolteachers or miners’ wives whose unrequited ballerina dreams have been passed on to their daughters, the next generation of Miss Gosia’s students.

If Karina had grown up in Gliwice, she would most certainly not have become a ballerina. She has horrible feet, wide, clumsy flippers with virtually no arch, a sturdy frame cast on a long torso and short legs, a body built more for milking cows than for pas de bourrée. She would never have been Miss Gosia’s star pupil. Karina’s parents would have put an end to bartering valuable coal and eggs for ballet lessons long before pointe shoes. Had her life started in Gliwice, she’d still be in Gliwice.

The girls down the road in Bytom had no ballet lessons. The children in Bytom had the Catholic Church. The boys were groomed for the priesthood, the girls the convent. Karina might have become a nun had she grown up in Bytom. Her parents would’ve been so proud. Maybe her life would be content and honorable had she chosen God.

But her life was never really a choice. She grew up in Zabrze, and in Zabrze lived Mr. Borowitz, the town’s piano teacher. He didn’t have a prestigious pedigree like Miss Gosia’s or a professional studio. Lessons were taught in his living room, which reeked of cat piss, yellowing books, and cigarettes. But Mr. Borowitz was a fine teacher. He was dedicated, stern but encouraging, and most important, he taught every one of his pupils to play Chopin. In Poland, Chopin is as revered as Pope John Paul II and God. Poland’s Holy Trinity.

Karina wasn’t born with the lithe body of a ballerina, but she was graced with the strong arms and long fingers of a pianist. She still remembers her first lesson with Mr. Borowitz. She was five. The glossy keys, the immediacy of pleasing sound, the story of the notes told by her fingers. She took to it instantly. Unlike most children, she never had to be ordered to practice. Quite the opposite, she had to be told to stop. Stop playing, and do your homework. Stop playing, and set the dinner table. Stop playing, it’s time for bed. She couldn’t resist playing. She still can’t.

Ultimately, piano became her ticket out of oppressive Poland, to Curtis and America and everything after. Everything after. That single decision—to learn piano—set everything that was to follow in motion, the ball in her life’s Rube Goldberg machine. She wouldn’t be here, right now, attending Hannah Chu’s graduation party, had she never played piano.

She parks her Honda behind a Mercedes, the last in a conga line of cars along the side of the road at least three blocks from Hannah’s house, assuming this is the closest she’ll get. She checks the clock on the dash. She’s a half hour late. Good. She’ll make a brief appearance, offer her congratulations, and leave.

Her heels click against the street as she walks, a human metronome, and her thoughts continue in pace with this rhythm. Without piano, she would never have met Richard. What would her life be like had she never met him? How many hours has she spent indulging in this fantasy? If added up, the hours would accumulate into days and weeks, possibly more. More time wasted. What could’ve been. What will never be.

Maybe she would’ve been satisfied had she never left her home country to pursue piano. She’d still be living with her parents, sleeping in her childhood bedroom. Or she’d be married to a boring man from Zabrze, a coal miner who earns a hard but respectable living, and she’d be a homemaker, raising their five children. Both wretched scenarios appeal to her now for a commonality she hates to acknowledge: a lack of loneliness.

Or what if she had attended Eastman instead of Curtis? She almost did. That single, arbitrary choice. She would never have met Richard. She would never have taken a step back, assuming with the arrogant and immortal optimism of a twenty-five-year-old that she’d have another chance, that the Wheel of Fortune’s spin would once again tick to a stop with its almighty arrow pointing directly at her. She’d waited years for another turn. Sometimes life gives you only one.

But then, if she’d never met Richard, their daughter, Grace, wouldn’t be here. Karina imagines an alternative reality in which her only daughter was never conceived and catches herself enjoying the variation almost to the point of wishing for it. She scolds herself, ashamed for allowing such a horrible thought. She loves Grace more than anything else. But the truth is, having Grace was another critical, fork-in-the-road, Gliwice-versus-Bytom-versus-Zabrze moment. Left brought Grace and tied Karina to Richard, the rope tight around her neck like a leash or a noose, depending on the day, for the next seventeen years. Right was the path not chosen. Who knows where that might’ve led?

Regret shadows her every step, a dog at her heels, as she now follows the winding stone path into the Chu family’s backyard. Hannah was accepted to Notre Dame, her first choice. Another piano student off to college. Hannah won’t continue with piano there. Like most of Karina’s students, Hannah took lessons because she wanted to add “plays piano” to her college application. The parents have the same motive, often exponentially more intense and unapologetic. So Hannah went through the motions, and their weekly half hour together was a soulless chore for both student and teacher.

A rare few of Karina’s students authentically like playing, and a couple even have talent and potential, but none of them love it enough to pursue it. You have to love it. She can’t blame them. These kids are all overscheduled, stressed-out, and too focused on getting into “the best” college to allow the nourishment passion needs to grow. A flower doesn’t blossom from a seed without the persistent love of sun and water.

But Hannah isn’t just one of Karina’s piano students. Hannah was Grace’s closest friend from the age of six through middle school. Playdates, sleepovers, Girl Scouts, soccer, trips to the mall and the movies—for most of Grace’s childhood, Hannah was like a younger sister. When Grace moved up to the high school and Hannah remained in middle school, the girls migrated naturally into older and younger social circles. There was never a falling-out. Instead, the friends endured a passive drifting on calm currents to separate but neighboring islands. They visited from time to time.

Hannah’s graduation milestone shouldn’t mean much to Karina, but it feels monumental, as if she’s sustaining a bigger loss than another matriculated piano student. It trips the switch of memories from this time last year, and it’s the end of Grace’s childhood all over again. Karina leaves her card for Hannah on the gift table and sighs.

Even though Hannah’s at the far end of the expansive backyard, Karina spots her straightaway, standing on the edge of the diving board, laughing, a line of wet girls and boys behind her, mostly boys in the pool, cheering her name, goading her to do something. Karina waits to see what it will be. Hannah launches into the air and cannonballs into the water, splashing the parents gathered near the pool. The parents complain, wiping water from their arms and faces, but they’re smiling. It’s a hot day, and the momentary spray probably felt refreshing. Karina notices Hannah’s mom, Pam, among them.

Now that Hannah is moving to Indiana, Karina assumes she won’t see Pam at all anymore. They stopped their Thursday-night wine dates some time ago, not long after Grace started high school. Over the past couple of years, their friendship dwindled to the handful of unfulfilling moments before or after Hannah’s weekly piano lesson. Tasked with shuttling her three kids to and from a dizzying schedule of extracurricular activities all over town, Pam was often too rushed to even come inside and waited for Hannah in her running car. Karina waved to her from the front door every Tuesday at 5:30 as Pam pulled away.

Karina almost didn’t come today. She feels self-conscious about showing up alone. Naturally introverted, she’d been extremely private about her marriage and even more shut-in about her divorce. Assuming Richard didn’t air their dirty laundry either, and that’s a safe bet, no one knows the details. So the gossip mill scripted the drama it wasn’t supplied. Someone has to be right, and someone has to be wrong. Based on the hushed stares, vanished chitchat, and pulled plastic smiles, Karina knows how she’s been cast.

The women in particular sympathize with him. Of course they do. They paint him as a sainted celebrity. He deserves to be with someone more elegant, someone who appreciates how extraordinary he is, someone more his equal. They assume she’s jealous of his accomplishments, resentful of his acclaim, bitter about his fame. She’s nothing but a rinky-dink suburban piano teacher instructing disinterested sixteen-year-olds on how to play Chopin. She clearly doesn’t have the self-esteem to be the wife of such a great man.

They don’t know. They don’t know a damn thing.

Grace just finished her freshman year at the University of Chicago. Karina had anticipated that Grace would be home for the summer by now and would be at Hannah’s party, but Grace decided to stay on campus through the summer, interning on a project with her math professor. Something about statistics. Karina’s proud of her daughter for being selected for the internship and thinks it’s a great opportunity, and yet, there’s that pang in Karina’s stomach, the familiar letdown. Grace could’ve chosen to come home, to spend the summer with her mother, but she didn’t. Karina knows it’s ridiculous to feel slighted, forsaken even, but her emotions sit on the throne of her intellect. This is how she’s built, and like any castle, her foundational stones aren’t easily rearranged.

Her divorce became absolute in September of Grace’s senior year, and exactly one year later, Grace moved a thousand miles away. First Richard left. Then Grace. Karina wonders when she’ll get used to the silence in her home, the emptiness, the memories that hang in each room as real as the artwork on the walls. She misses her daughter’s voice chatting on the phone; her giggling girlfriends; her shoes in every room; her hair elastics, towels, and clothes on the floor; the lights left on. She misses her daughter.

She does not miss Richard. When he moved out, his absence felt more like a new presence than a subtraction. The sweet calm that took up residence after he left filled more space than his human form and colossal ego ever did. She did not miss him then or now.

But going to these kinds of family events alone, without a husband, tilts her off-balance as if she were one cheek atop a two-legged stool. So in that sense, she misses him. For the stability. She’s forty-five and divorced. Single. In Poland, she’d be considered a disgrace. But she’s been in America now for over half her life. Her situation is common in this secular culture and imposes no shame. Yet, she feels ashamed. You can take the girl out of Poland, but you can’t take Poland out of the girl.

Not recognizing any of the other parents, she takes a deep breath and begins the long, awkward walk alone over to Pam. Karina spent an absurdly long time getting ready for this party. Which dress, which shoes, which earrings? She blew out her hair. She even got a manicure yesterday. For what? It’s not as if she’s trying to impress Hannah or Pam or any of the parents. And it’s not as if there will be any single men here, not that she’s looking for a man anyway.

She knows why. She’ll be damned if anyone here looks at her and thinks, Poor Karina. Her life’s a mess, and she looks it, too. The other reason is Richard. Pam and Scott Chu are his friends, too. Richard was probably invited. She could’ve asked Pam if Richard was on the guest list—not that it mattered, just to be forewarned—but she chickened out.

So there it is, the stomach-turning possibility that he might be here, and the even more putrid thought that he might show up with the latest skinny little twentysomething tart hanging on his arm and every self-important word. Karina rubs her lips together, making sure her lipstick hasn’t clumped.

Her eyes poke around the yard. He’s not standing with Pam and the cluster of parents by the pool house. Karina scans the pool, the grilling island, the lawn. She doesn’t see him.

She arrives at the pool house and inserts herself into the circle of Pam and Scott and other parents. Their voices instantly drop, their eyes conspiring. Time pauses.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Karina asks.

The circle looks to Pam.

“Um . . .” Pam hesitates. “We were just talking about Richard.”

“Oh?” Karina waits, her heart bracing for something humiliating. No one says a word. “What about him?”

“He canceled his tour.”

“Oh.” This isn’t earth-shattering news. He’s canceled gigs and touring dates before. Once, he couldn’t stand the conductor and refused to set foot onstage with him. Another time, Richard had to be replaced last minute because he got drunk at an airport bar and missed his flight. She wonders what reason he has this time. But Pam and Scott and the others stare at her with grave expressions, as if she should have something more compassionate to say on the subject.

Her stomach floods with emotion, her inner streets crowding fast as a fervent protest stands upon its soapbox in her center, outraged that she has to deal with this, that Pam especially can’t be more sensitive to her. Richard’s canceled tour isn’t her concern. She divorced him. His life isn’t her problem anymore.

“You really don’t know?” asks Pam.

They all wait for her answer, lips shut, bodies still, an audience engrossed in watching a play.

“What? What, is he dying or something?”

A nervous half-laugh escapes her, and the sound finds no harmony. She searches the circle of parents for connection, even if the comment was slightly inappropriate, for someone to forgive her a bit of dark humor. But everyone either looks horrified or away. Everyone but Pam. Her eyes betray a reluctant nod.

“Karina, he has ALS.”

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