Finding the Words: Talking Children Through the Tough Times

by Rosaleen McElvaney

Overview

Finding the Words: Talking Children through the Tough Times is for parents or carers who who want to build confidence in talking with their children about difficult subjects. Creating good channels of communication with our children is an essential aspect of parenting, but can often be challenging. This book emphasises the importance of self-awareness: how we need to reflect on ourselves and the way we are with our children before we can begin to foster meaningful communication. It emphasises the importance of knowing our own child’s uniqueness – we, as parents and carers, need to tailor our conversations, taking account of their individuality. Drawing on the author’s extensive professional experience, this book also focuses on some key areas that may be difficult for children to talk about, such as parental separation, death, bullying and sexual abuse.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781847305954
Publisher:	Veritas Company LTD
Publication date:	06/20/2015
Pages:	142
Product dimensions:	5.40(w) x 8.40(h) x 0.50(d)

Table of Contents

Introduction 9

1 Know Yourself 17

2 Communication throughout Childhood and Adolescence 29

3 Talking with Children about Separation 45

4 Talking with Children about Death 63

5 Talking with Children about Bullying 77

6 Talking about Sexual Abuse 91

7 Talking with Friends 109

8 When Professional Help is Needed 123

Afterword 139

Editorial Reviews

10/19/2015
Clinical psychologist and psychotherapist McElvaney helps parents tackle difficult conversations in this compact guide. In individual chapters, she addresses separation, death, bullying, and sexual abuse, and also offers general advice for keeping channels open throughout childhood and adolescence. She emphasizes, however, that there is no simple formula; each child's unique thoughts and feelings must be explored and nurtured by setting a pattern of honest dialogue and active listening from an early age. Suggesting that parents follow as well as lead, McElvaney advises closely listening to and observing children to discern the subjects troubling them. She also encourages parents to carefully examine their personal attitudes toward difficult topics, in order to avoid transferring emotions rooted in their own experience onto their child. Many chapters are arranged into sections entitled "Know Yourself," "Know Your Child," "Listen," "Ask," and "Reassure," with helpful summaries of major chapter points. The author takes into account children of all ages, with specific age-appropriate tips (e.g., listening to the conversations between grade school–age kids while carpooling is a good way to tune into their peer-oriented world). Parents and caregivers of children, from preschool to the teen years, will find this a helpful and encouraging communication road map, even when difficult topics take parents and kids outside their comfort zones. (Sept.)

Publishers Weekly