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GOOPS AND HOW TO BE THEM

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction _Page_ 1
Table Manners--I 3
Table Manners--II 5
Cleanliness 7
Neatness 9
Courtesy 11
Generosity 13
Consideration 15
Miss Manners 17
Borrowing 19
Memory 21
Books 23
Honesty 25
"Why?" 27
Bed-Time 29
Modesty 31
Disfiguration 33
Bravery 35
Tidiness 37
Patience 39
Fortitude 41
George Adolphus 43
Politeness 45
Gentleness 47
Hospitality 49
Pets 51
Remember 53
Curiosity 55
Willy 57
Clothes 59
Helpfulness 61
Quietness 63
Order 65
Teasing 67
Interruption 69
Cry-Baby 71
Caution 73
Tardiness 75
Obedience 77
Church Headaches 79
Perseverance 81
Doll-Time 83
Combing and Curling 85
Cheerfulness 87

_Of these Rhymes, ten first appeared in_ "St. Nicholas," _and are here
reprinted by permission of the_ Century Company.

[Illustration: Introduction]

_INTRODUCTION_

Let me introduce a Race
Void of Beauty and of Grace,
Extraordinary Creatures
With a Paucity of Features.
Though their Forms are fashioned ill,
They have Manners stranger still;
For in Rudeness they're Precocious,
They're Atrocious, they're Ferocious!
Yet you'll learn, if you are Bright,
Politeness from the Impolite.
When you've finished with the Book,
At your Conduct take a Look;
Ask yourself, upon the Spot,
_Are you Goop, or are you Not?_
For, although it's Fun to See them
It is TERRIBLE to Be them!

[Illustration]

[Illustration: Table Manners.--I.]

_TABLE MANNERS.--I._

The Goops they lick their fingers,
And the Goops they lick their knives;
They spill their broth on the tablecloth--
Oh, they lead disgusting lives!
The Goops they talk while eating,
And loud and fast they chew;
And that is why I'm glad that I
Am not a Goop--are you?

[Illustration]

[Illustration: Table Manners.--II.]

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GOOPS AND HOW TO BE THEM