Table of Contents
Introduction 7
Chapter 1 Seven Rules for Living in Detroit: Or, How to Not Look Like a Dumbass the Moment You Get Here 11
Chapter 2 The Quick-and-Dirty Tour 19
Chapter 3 Difficult Questions About Detroit With Simple Answers 39
Chapter 4 How Not to Offend People When Talking About Detroit 55
Chapter 5 How You Should Be Talking About Detroit 63
Chapter 6 How to Be White In Detroit 69
Chapter 7 How to Make Peace With the Suburbs 81
Chapter 8 How to Drive in Detroit 91
Chapter 9 How to Deal With the Men in This Town 111
Chapter 10 How to Be a Woman in This Town 119
Chapter 11 How to Party Like a Detroiter 125
Chapter 12 How to Raise a Detroit Kid 139
Chapter 13 How to Do Business in Detroit 147
Chapter 14 How to House-Hunt in Detroit 159
Chapter 15 How to Renovate a Detroit House Without Being a Jackass 179
Chapter 16 How, if Possible, to Discuss Detroit's Most Difficult Topic 195
Chapter 17 How Not to Be a Jealous Jackass 203
Chapter 18 How to Take In Detroit Media 209
Chapter 19 How to Be Gay in Detroit 229
Chapter 20 How to Be a Detroit Hipster 235
Chapter 21 How to Be Black in Detroit 243
Closing Thoughts 249
Acknowledgements 252
About the Author 255
