Publishers Weekly
05/22/2023
In Israeli writer Blum’s moving English-language debut, an Israeli woman named Yoella contends with her estrangement from her daughter, Leah, who left home at 18. A painful scene sets the stage, with an older Yoella standing on a street in contemporary Groningen, in the Netherlands, surreptitiously peeping through the windows of Leah’s house to see her two granddaughters, ages six and five, for the first time. Yoella then recounts meeting an older professor named Meir Driman when she was 30. She tells him about her father’s death when she was a teenager and her episodes of depression, and soon the two become romantically involved and have Leah. She’s much loved by both of her parents, but Meir sometimes thinks Yoella doesn’t give Leah enough space to grow on her own and gain independence. Yoella in turn fears Meir will leave them after he has a short-lived affair with a student. In high school, Leah falls in love with a classmate who rejects her, setting off a cascade of misunderstandings that lead to disaster. Blum builds a great deal of suspense over what caused Leah to flee, and she creates a realistic portrayal of the joys, sorrows, and uncertainties of motherhood. This one hits hard. Agent: Deborah Harris, Deborah Harris Agency. (July)
From the Publisher
Praise for How to Love Your Daughter:
“A stone-cold masterwork of psychological tension. Often its sentences are deceptively clear, as transparent and menacing as a swarm of jellyfish. Elsewhere, the tone swerves into humor, even goofiness. What links the two disparate registers, and all those in between, is an unerring authenticity: Every observation, gesture and piece of dialogue rings true. . . . its intrigues and revelations are dramatic enough to be wholly satisfying. Its final pages had me holding my breath.” —Flynn Berry, New York Times Book Review
“Mesmerising, disquieting … Blum is a virtuoso at stoking unease…. [An] unforgettable book.” —Guardian
“In a similar vein as Elena Ferrante's The Lost Daughter and Sheila Heti's Motherhood, this gut-punch of a novel … [is] for anyone who’s been a daughter, a mother or both.” —PureWow
“Enthralling. . . . a novel of emotional depth and complexity, at once disturbing and enlightening.” —Hadassah Magazine
“Riveting. … Hand this one to fans of Jenny Offill or those interested in the ambiguities and incongruities of love.” —Shelf Awareness
“For all its uncanny unanswerability, this is a firmly earthbound, often beautiful, and wholly soul-stirring contemplation of parental love and the effortful, lifelong desire to see beyond the gauze of our own perceptions.” —Booklist
“Moving . . . . This one hits hard.” —Publishers Weekly
“A dissection of misapplied maternal love. . . . part detective story, part morality tale. . . . Deft.” —Kirkus Reviews
“A mother’s adoration of her only child might be commonplace, but it is never simple. Hila Blum explores one particular mother-daughter relationship with remarkable acuity. Her novel takes us on a suspenseful psychological journey as she plumbs a great mystery: how the purest maternal love can lead to the most unwanted and even disastrous consequences.” —Sigrid Nunez, author of The Friend and What Are You Going Through
“This mesmerizing, quietly harrowing novel begins with a mother’s complete estrangement from her adult daughter and works backward to reveal the ways that maternal love can strangle when it was only trying to cradle, can recklessly misdirect when it wanted to protect. Excellent and unforgettable.” —Ann Packer, author of The Children’s Crusade and The Dive from Clausen’s Pier
“A striking and memorable novel. With single-minded intensity, How to Love Your Daughter reckons with parent-child boundaries: the ones that are clear, and the ones that are sometimes hazy, or dangerously nonexistent.” —Meg Wolitzer
“Every sentence in this quiet, beautiful novel carries a great freight of emotion. Hila Blum is my new favourite writer.” —Louise Kennedy, author of Trespasses
Kirkus Reviews
2023-04-24
Why has an adored child abandoned her parents’ home, lied about her whereabouts, and concealed her new family?
Israeli writer Blum’s brief, sometimes stiflingly close-focus new novel opens with Yoella Linden secretly watching her daughter Leah’s family from the outside, through a window. Leah walked out of her parents’ home in Israel at age 18 and pretended she was traveling the world; in fact, she had settled in Groningen, Holland, married, and become a mother herself, to two daughters. In a cool narrative voice, Yoella takes her time to unpack the mystery of Leah’s disappearance, interleaving memories of the girl’s childhood with glimpses of her own marriage, references to the mother-daughter fiction she has read, and episodes depicting her mental fragility. Yoella has been seeing a psychiatrist for 16 years to help her deal with intermittent depression that began at age 9. Leah’s childhood is conveyed in intimate domestic scenes, often filled with reciprocated feelings across the years. Despite occasional power struggles and discord, Leah was “one of those girls who was endlessly loved by their parents…the love of our lives.” But around the edges of this familial norm, we learn about more troubling aspects of Yoella’s marriage to Meir: his occasional affairs; his love for Leah but opposition to having further children, leading to abortions. And slowly another narrative takes center stage—Yoella’s response to a crisis of Leah’s making, leading to collusion and manipulation and a devastating outcome. Bit by bit Blum’s novel reveals itself to be a dissection of misapplied maternal love in one particular instance, in which emotions and impulses contradict themselves and turn inside out. Part detective story, part morality tale, this is a disturbing story of being damaged and damaging.
A deft, claustrophobic tale that takes the shine off motherhood’s halo while sideswiping men, too.
