I'll Eat When I'm Dead
Every weekday morning, as the sun rose above Sixth Avenue, a peerless crop of women-frames poised, behavior polished, networks connected, and bodies generally buffed to a high sheen-were herded by the cattle prod of their own ambition to one particular building. They're smart, stylish, and sophisticated, even the one found dead in her office.

When stylish Hillary Whitney dies alone in a locked, windowless conference room at the offices of RAGE Fashion Book, her death is initially ruled an unfortunate side effect of the unrelenting pressure to be thin. But Hillary's best friend and fellow RAGE editor Catherine Ono knows her friend's dieting wasn't a capital P problem. If beauty could kill, it'd take more than that.

When two months later, a cryptic note in Hillary's handwriting ends up in the office of the NYPD and the case is reopened, Det. Mark Hutton is led straight into the glamorous world of RAGE and into the life of hot-headed and fiercely fabulous Cat, who insists on joining the investigation. Surrounded by a supporting cast of party girls, Type A narcissists and half- dead socialites, Cat and her colleague Bess Bonner are determined to solve the case and achieve sartorial perfection. But their amateur detective work has disastrous results, and the two ingenues are caught in a web of drugs, sex, lies and moisturizer that changes their lives forever.

Viciously funny, this sharp and satirical take on the politics of women's bodies and women's work is an addictive debut novel that dazzles with style and savoire faire.
1124564356
I'll Eat When I'm Dead
Every weekday morning, as the sun rose above Sixth Avenue, a peerless crop of women-frames poised, behavior polished, networks connected, and bodies generally buffed to a high sheen-were herded by the cattle prod of their own ambition to one particular building. They're smart, stylish, and sophisticated, even the one found dead in her office.

When stylish Hillary Whitney dies alone in a locked, windowless conference room at the offices of RAGE Fashion Book, her death is initially ruled an unfortunate side effect of the unrelenting pressure to be thin. But Hillary's best friend and fellow RAGE editor Catherine Ono knows her friend's dieting wasn't a capital P problem. If beauty could kill, it'd take more than that.

When two months later, a cryptic note in Hillary's handwriting ends up in the office of the NYPD and the case is reopened, Det. Mark Hutton is led straight into the glamorous world of RAGE and into the life of hot-headed and fiercely fabulous Cat, who insists on joining the investigation. Surrounded by a supporting cast of party girls, Type A narcissists and half- dead socialites, Cat and her colleague Bess Bonner are determined to solve the case and achieve sartorial perfection. But their amateur detective work has disastrous results, and the two ingenues are caught in a web of drugs, sex, lies and moisturizer that changes their lives forever.

Viciously funny, this sharp and satirical take on the politics of women's bodies and women's work is an addictive debut novel that dazzles with style and savoire faire.
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I'll Eat When I'm Dead

I'll Eat When I'm Dead

by Barbara Bourland

Narrated by Eileen Stevens

Unabridged — 10 hours, 48 minutes

I'll Eat When I'm Dead

I'll Eat When I'm Dead

by Barbara Bourland

Narrated by Eileen Stevens

Unabridged — 10 hours, 48 minutes

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Overview

Every weekday morning, as the sun rose above Sixth Avenue, a peerless crop of women-frames poised, behavior polished, networks connected, and bodies generally buffed to a high sheen-were herded by the cattle prod of their own ambition to one particular building. They're smart, stylish, and sophisticated, even the one found dead in her office.

When stylish Hillary Whitney dies alone in a locked, windowless conference room at the offices of RAGE Fashion Book, her death is initially ruled an unfortunate side effect of the unrelenting pressure to be thin. But Hillary's best friend and fellow RAGE editor Catherine Ono knows her friend's dieting wasn't a capital P problem. If beauty could kill, it'd take more than that.

When two months later, a cryptic note in Hillary's handwriting ends up in the office of the NYPD and the case is reopened, Det. Mark Hutton is led straight into the glamorous world of RAGE and into the life of hot-headed and fiercely fabulous Cat, who insists on joining the investigation. Surrounded by a supporting cast of party girls, Type A narcissists and half- dead socialites, Cat and her colleague Bess Bonner are determined to solve the case and achieve sartorial perfection. But their amateur detective work has disastrous results, and the two ingenues are caught in a web of drugs, sex, lies and moisturizer that changes their lives forever.

Viciously funny, this sharp and satirical take on the politics of women's bodies and women's work is an addictive debut novel that dazzles with style and savoire faire.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

03/20/2017
In her debut, Bourland attempts to update The Devil Wears Prada and kick it up a notch with the story of a thoroughly modern assistant editor at a Vogue-like fashion magazine who teams up with an NYPD detective to solve a murder mystery. The action begins when editor Hillary Whitney’s body, in Dior pumps, is discovered on the floor of a Rage Fashion Book workroom. Police conclude she died from a heart attack caused by extreme dieting, but they reopen the case after seeing a cryptic message she sent her brother. Det. Mark Sutton interviews Hillary’s silk-and-leather-clad friend and assistant, Flemish-Japanese Cat Ono, prompting Cat to try to dig up more about Hillary’s untimely demise. As Rage struggles to compete against online startup Mania, Cat assists Hillary’s replacement (the ambitious socialite Lou), while tracking Hillary’s designer eye drops to an upscale Brooklyn cosmetics shop, then joining forces with friends and the police to uncover the shop’s secrets. Bourland narrates at a quick New York City tempo, detailing perks, personal connections, and property values, both satirizing and celebrating fashion and feminism. Will the hot cop and the cool fashionista hook up? Can Rage pivot to adjust to a changing market? Can its employees pivot without ruining their stilettos? Do crimes committed by the cosmetics firm go beyond overcharging? The writing is stylish even when the answers are obvious. (May)

From the Publisher

"A smart, satirical take on fashion and media that will have readers snorting with laughter."—The New York Post

"A whodunnit with a Devil Wears Prada twist...If you love UnReal, then this smart, sassy novel will be right up your alley."—Refinery29

"Sex. Drugs. Dries van Noten. I'll Eat When I'm Deadskewers Tribe Fashion with wit and wicked intelligence. From Finnish toast-only restaurants to kobe-beef hide bikinis and grandiose faux feminism, Barbara Bourland makes you laugh out loud, and keep turning the page. A deft, smart, and hilarious debut."—Wednesday Martin, PhD, New York Times bestselling author of Primates of Park Avenue

"A highly polished satire... Hilarious."—Sunday Times

"Let me tell you, contrary to you might have heard, books about fashion can be both smart and funny. Barbara Bourland's snarky debut novel manages to tackle the politics of fashion magazines, the pitfalls and pratfalls being a social media influencer, and the true dangers of the pressures put on women for their appearances and the very real threats to their mental and physical health. And yet Bourland walks the line between serious and comedy so deftly that anyone who has read a women's magazine or caught an episode of America's Next Top Model will understand the jokes and the lessons without conflict."—Fortune

"A murder investigation hijacked by a hotheaded fashion magazine editor and her posse of party girls, narcissists, and socialites--what could go wrong?... Bourland turns a sharp eye to the politics of women's bodies and work environments in this compulsively readable mystery."—Read it Forward

"I'll Eat When I'm Dead combines sharp satire of the beauty-and-fashion industry with a twisty mystery."—Tampa Bay Times

"One part deliciously satirical send-up, one part murder mystery, I'll Eat When I'm Dead had me laughing out loud. This bold and wildly entertaining, in-your-face novel signals the arrival of Barbara Bourland as an exciting and savvy new voice."—Sara Blaedel, #1 international bestselling author of The Forgotten Girls

"I can't put I'll Eat When I'm Dead down, I LOVE it. Biting, funny, and brilliantly subversive; Bourland's debut is like The Devil Wears Prada meets American Psycho."Louise O'Neill, author of Only Ever Yours and Asking For It

"Bourland's delightfully snarky debut leans heavily on satire, poking razor-sharp fun at the beauty industry and the cut-throat world that Bess and Cat inhabit, and some scenes are laugh-out-loud funny. However, for all the outrageous (and eye-opening) focus on makeup, beauty, fashion, and of course, the desire to be thin, there are tantalizing glimpses of the vulnerability and insecurities beneath the surface. Death by beauty was never so much fun."—Kirkus

"Delightfully, playfully skewering the fashion and beauty industries, this is like The Devil Wears Prada with more feminism, plus murder."—Booklist

"Barbara Bourland deftly tackles body-image issues with wit in this mystery."—US Weekly

"A reckless adventure in the world of starry-eyed models, dubiously sourced drugs, anorexia, and Instagram. But don't let the frills and flashbulbs fool you. Barbara Bourland is here to show you that fashion is a deadly serious business."—Mikita Brottman, author of The Maximum Security Book Club

A smart feminist fashion manifesto packed with pulpy, sexy, murderous intrigue. Highly entertaining!—Elizabeth Cline, author of Overdressed

"A compulsively readable, satirical romp with a sharp and vicious twist, I'll Eat When I'm Dead is a timely, smart, and perceptive mystery,"—K.J Howe, author of The Freedom Broker

"Funny, fierce, feminist."Sarra Manning, Red (UK)

"I'll Eat When I'm Dead had me hooked with its biting satire of the fashion world's dark underbelly. And what a heroine! Anyone who has opened up a woman's magazine and despaired at the content should read this book."—Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett, Co-Editor of The Vagenda

"Readers will devour this mystery by Bourland. What at first seems a death by natural causes turns into a murder that will have you guessing at whodunit up until the very end. . . A fun, witty, edge-of-your-seat ride through the demanding and sometimes dangerous world of fashion.—RT Book Reviews

"Thoroughly modern... stylish. Bourland narrates at a quick New York City tempo, detailing perks, personal connections, and property values, both satirizing and celebrating fashion and feminism."—Publisher's Weekly

"The darker side of perfection is cast under the spotlight [in this] black comedy."—Sunday Mirror

Kirkus Reviews

2017-03-07
When the beautiful Hillary Whitney is found dead, her co-workers smell a rat, but hunting for clues in stilettos isn't all it's cracked up to be.Hillary is found dead—of starvation, no less—in a locked workroom of the New York City fashion mag RAGE Fashion Book, and her co-workers are shocked, especially her close friend and RAGE's senior editor, Catherine "Cat" Ono. While her death isn't officially labeled murder, Detective Mark Hutton wants to dig deeper, smelling a career maker, and enlists Cat's help. Sparks fly between the two but quickly cool after a sting goes south, with Cat as bait. If Cat and her friend Bess Bonner, the magazine's associate editor, thought they'd seen enough death, they'd be wrong. After the fallout from the sting, Cat and Bess, in an attempt at damage control, are remade as the glam faces of RAGE, and the endless photo shoots, appearances, and dresses so tight they have to be sewn on are only relieved by alcohol and drugs, of which there are plenty. Hutton becomes increasingly alarmed by their behavior, and it looks like a RAGE employee has her own agenda and will kill to achieve it. Bourland's delightfully snarky (with names such as Whig Beaton Molton-Mauve Lucas) debut leans heavily on satire, poking razor-sharp fun at the beauty industry and the cutthroat world that Bess and Cat inhabit, and some scenes are laugh-out-loud funny: keep an eye out for the makeover Cat and Bess give two female police officers for an undercover job. However, for all the outrageous (and eye-opening) focus on makeup, beauty, fashion, and, of course, the desire to be thin, there are tantalizing glimpses of the vulnerability and insecurities beneath the surface, especially with Cat, who longs for her home in Brussels, the smell of her mother's horses, and freedom from the constraints that are put on women in the name of beauty. Death by beauty was never so much fun.

Product Details

BN ID: 2940170003006
Publisher: Hachette Audio
Publication date: 05/02/2017
Edition description: Unabridged
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