I'm Sorry for My Loss: An Urgent Examination of Reproductive Care in America

by Rebecca Little, Colleen Long

Overview

A must-read investigation of reproductive health under fire in Post-Roe America.

More than a million people lose a pregnancy each year, whether through miscarriage, stillbirth, or termination for medical reasons. For most, the experience often casts a shadow of isolation, shame, and blame. In the aftermath of the 2022 decision to overturn Roe v Wade, 25 million people of childbearing age live in states with laws that restrict access to abortion, including for those who never wanted to end their pregnancies. How did we get here?

Rebecca Little and Colleen Long, childhood friends who grew up to be journalists, both experienced late-term loss, and together they take an incisive, deeply reported look at the issue, working to shatter taboos that have made so many pregnant people feel ashamed and alone. They trace the experience of pregnancy loss and reproductive care from America's founding to the present day, exposing the deep impact made by a dangerous tangle of laws, politics, medicine, racism, and misogyny. Combining powerful personal narratives with exhaustive research, I'm Sorry for My Loss is a comprehensive examination on how pregnancy loss came to be so stigmatized and politicized, and why a system of more compassionate care is critical for everyone.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781728292755
Publisher:	Sourcebooks
Publication date:	09/24/2024
Pages:	496
Sales rank:	195,289
Product dimensions:	6.25(w) x 9.25(h) x 1.49(d)

Editorial Reviews

2024-07-10
Two journalists examine the meaning of pregnancy loss in American culture and their own lives.

Giving birth to stillborn babies taught authors Little and Long one very painful lesson: “America is bad at talking about pregnancy loss.” It also showed them that pregnancy loss silence concealed other interconnected issues like miscarriage, abortion, and grief that profoundly impacted maternal lives. In this book, Little and Long use their experiences—and those of the many individuals they interviewed—as launching points into a larger discussion about reproduction and reproductive care in the United States. They argue that the great wall of silence they and others encountered derives from language that does not adequately do justice to the multifaceted nature of pregnancy loss. Indeed, any words that do exist “are strictly clinical or infused with stark political baggage.” They further observe that the overwhelming sense of failure that often accompanies such loss can be attributed to a system that—even in the more liberalRoe v. Wade era—emphasized the idea that “all kept pregnancies were wanted.” Miscarriage, like abortion, was therefore and implicitly a mother’s fault, an idea that kept women from speaking out about both for fear of being stigmatized. Now, in a hyperpunitive post-Roe era, discussion of miscarriage and abortion as part of the same reproductive spectrum is especially fraught, even though one might look like the other and be treated by the same methods. The authors point out that people are still finding the courage to share their experiences and grief through social media, but post-loss mourning is still viewed as a “malady” rather than a natural process. Sobering and well researched, this book lays bare major fault lines in a maternal reproductive care system in dire need of radical transformation.

Necessary, thoughtful, and heartfelt.

Kirkus Reviews

"Written with compassion and rigorous research, this is a book America needs right now." — Leah Hazard, midwife and author of Womb: The Inside Story of Where We All Began

"This richly reported and deeply personal book is not just for people who have experienced pregnancy loss, but for anyone who cares about women living in America today." — Jessica Zucker, PhD, psychologist and author of I Had a Miscarriage: A Memoir, a Movement

"A riveting, compassionate and comprehensive exploration of the roots of America's current nightmarish landscape of reproductive care. I’m Sorry for My Loss is compelling, heartbreaking and whip-smart, and should be read by every American, no matter their politics, gender, or where they are in their reproductive journey. Long and Little paint a vivid portrait of how many Americans are rendered powerless in pregnancy and childbirth through lack of information, and demonstrate just how empowering knowledge can be." — Katherine Leyton, author of Motherlike and All the Gold Hurts My Mouth

"Powerful, eye-opening, and vital, I’m Sorry for My Loss shines a light on one of the biggest taboos in women’s lives. It’s a must-read for policymakers, healthcare professionals, and everybody who wants a better understanding of the gray areas between a perfect pregnancy and abortion." — Marina Gerner, journalist and author of The Vagina Business

"Required reading to grasp the fascinating history behind our nation's befuddled and often hypocritical culture around pregnancy loss—with enough wry humor to cushion the inevitable outrage. (If we don't laugh, we'll cry!) As a stillbirth mother, I found it incredibly validating. As a maternal health activist, invaluably enlightening." — Samantha Banerjee, executive director of PUSH for Empowered Pregnancy

"Rejecting the stigma that surrounds discussing the mixed emotions and painful realities of our reproductive lives, this book powerfully and meaningfully connects the personal with the political in its description of intimate experiences of shame, racism, and misogyny. Nothing could be more important in this critical moment of reproductive health politics." — Sarah Handley-Cousins, Nursing Clio and Dig: A History Podcast

From the Publisher