Is That Me Yelling?: A Parent's Guide to Getting Your Kids to Cooperate Without Losing Your Cool

by Rona Renner, Christine Carter (Foreword by)

Overview

Being a parent is hard work! And when your child refuses to do even the little things—like picking up their toys, taking a bath, or getting in the car to go to school—it’s easy to become frustrated. But what if there was a gentle, effective way for you to improve your kid's behavior without losing your cool or raising your voice? In Is That Me Yelling? leading authority on parenting, Rona Renner outlines effective communication strategies that focus on your child’s unique temperament.

While most books on discipline are “one size fits all,” this book offers a tailored parenting approach. Inside, you will learn powerful mindfulness techniques based in cognitive behavioral theory (CBT) and temperament theory to help reduce conflict and foster cooperation, respect, and understanding in your family. You will also learn the real reasons behind your frustration, how your unique temperament, as well as your child’s, can contribute to you losing your temper, and how you can start feeling calm and connecting with your child in a positive way, right away.

As a parent, you are often under a great deal of stress. Between helping your child with their homework, running a household, and working, it’s only natural to feel overwhelmed at times. But that’s why you need real, practical solutions to help you communicate effectively and compassionately with your children in a way that will benefit you both. This book will show you how.

To learn more, visit www.nurserona.com.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781608829095
Publisher:	New Harbinger Publications
Publication date:	05/01/2014
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	200
Sales rank:	796,631
File size:	2 MB

About the Author

Rona Renner, RN, graduated from Brooklyn College School of Nursing in 1966, and she has since been dedicated to solving problems and helping people reduce their suffering. Her extensive experience includes working in medical hospitals and mental health programs in New York City and California; training women in childbirth preparation in Zaire, Africa (now the Democratic Republic of the Congo); helping to start a learning disabilities program in Pune, India; and providing parent education and ADHD and temperament counseling at Kaiser Permanente in Northern California. Renner was the founder of the Childhood Matters and Nuestros Niños call-in parenting radio shows, and hosted the Childhood Matters radio show for ten years. She currently consults and teaches classes for mental health professionals, teachers, and parents throughout the San Francisco Bay Area and beyond. Her greatest teachers have been her four children, two grandsons, and her husband Mick. She lives in Berkeley, CA. To learn more, visit nurserona.com.
 
Foreword writer Christine Carter, PhD, is a happiness expert, sociologist, and the author of Raising Happiness: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kidsand Happier Parents. Carter has helped thousands of people find more joy in their lives through her books, online classes, coaching, and speaking engagements. She teaches happiness classes online throughout the year to a global audience on her website www.christinecarter.com. Her blog is syndicated on the Huffington Post and Psychology Today.

Table of Contents

Foreword Christine Carter vii

Introduction: You're Not Alone 1

Part 1 Understanding Yelling

1 "Is That Me Yelling?": Becoming Aware of Yourself 7

2 "Why Am I Yelling?": Understanding Everyday Triggers 23

3 "Why Am I Really Yelling?": Digging Deeper 47

4 "What's Temperament Got to Do with It?": Adapting Your Parenting Style to Your Child's Temperament 65

Part 2 Everyday Strategies for Yelling Less

5 "Yelling Is So Easy… Can I Really Stop?" Observing and Gathering Data for Success 87

6 "What Can I Do Instead of Yelling?": Shifting Gears One Step at a Time 105

7 "Help, Another Storm Is Coming!": Stay Calm, Make Repairs, and Plan Your Course 133

Part 3 Special Circumstances

8 "Help, I'm Not the Yeller": Dealing with the Yeller in Your Family 159

9 "How Can I Stop Yelling When My Life Is So Challenging?": Dealing with Difficult Situations, Disorders, and Differences 179

Epilogue: World Peace Begins at Home 199

Acknowledgments 201

Appendix: Meditations 205

Resources 209

References 213

Interviews

Renner lives in Berkeley, CA.

Editorial Reviews

“Finally! An insightful, practical guide that does not shame or preach. Is That Me Yelling? provides sensible, easy-to-use techniques using compassion and self-awareness to not only improve ourselves as parents and grandparents, but to also obtain desired behavior changes in our children. This refreshing go-to guide is destined to become indispensable, filling a void in current parenting literature.”
—Shoshana Bennett, PhD, clinical psychologist, parental depression specialist, and author of Postpartum Depression for Dummies


“Rona Renner counseled me through my early parenting with a very spirited child, and saved us both from much heartbreak anddisaster! That was me yelling—until I learned the skills and approaches her book offers. What a gift to parents, and to their children!”
—Betsy Rose, mindful educator, musician, and parent

From the Publisher

03/01/2014
Find an adult yelling, and you'll probably find a kid within spitting distance. Being a yeller is hardly a badge of honor, but all parents find themselves doing it. Parenting radio show regular (founder & former host, "Childhood Matters"), nurse Renner here offers parents a guide to curbing this default habit by examining why parents raise their voices, how temperament affects parenting styles, what to do instead of raising one's voice, and understanding triggers. Most yelling, she argues, is "not about teaching; it's about stopping behavior by intimidation or fear, and it's about expressing your negative feelings." VERDICT Renner includes exercises, personal reflections, narratives from other parents, and checklists for self-rumination. The book has a bit of a workshop feel to it, but those committed will find direction for keeping their cool when screaming seems like the only option.

Library Journal