Table of Contents
Foreword Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman 9
Introduction 11
1 Give Me a Casual Corner Suit and Get Out of My Way 17
2 How Walmart and a Frito Pie Made All the Difference 28
3 Yes, Virginia, There Is Such a Thing as a Naugahyde Sofa 41
4 Se Habla Van Halen? 55
5 Why a Trans Am Might Be Overrated 67
6 The Dirty Truth of a White Couch 75
7 Forty Is Not the New Thirty 84
8 Bangs, Bangs, You're Dead 91
9 So You Think You Can Parent 99
10 Fish, Frogs, Crabs, and a Farm of Lies 111
11 True Tales of Canine Delinquents 122
12 The Glamorous Life of a Writer 138
13 To Exercise or Not to Exercise? That's Not a Real Question 149
14 Autocorrect Is the Devil 162
15 The Leader of the Band 168
16 Baby Sister 176
17 Dodging a Bullet 184
18 When Life Is a Mixture of Sweet and Sad 193
19 Church of the Small Things 207
Acknowledgments 219
Special Extra Content from Melanie 223