My Suicide Race: Winning Over the Trauma of Addiction, Recovery, and Coming Out

by Mark A. Turnipseed

Overview

At the tender age of six, Mark Turnipseed received what he felt was a clear and devastating message: it isn't okay to like other boys, and if you do, you're bound for hell. His confusion and self-hatred made him determined to become the boy he believed he was supposed to be, but in attempting to live a lie, he descended into a hell of his own making.

In this unflinchingly honest debut memoir, Mark takes us on a harrowing journey as he bounces off the restrictive walls of his closet and plunges into the darkness of drug and alcohol addiction, prostitution, and suicide attempts. He bravely lets us inside the raw, tragic mind of an addict and sexual trauma survivor whose self-denial threatens to destroy him and everyone who loves him.

After surviving numerous relapses, Mark finally finds a surprising key to saving his own life. While training for a triathlon, he embraces a fresh commitment to sober strategies that lead to good health, self-acceptance, and authenticity-offering hope for all who struggle with the shame and self-hatred that fuel addictions.

While showing that recovery is possible even for those who struggle for years to reach sobriety, My Suicide Race also unveils the often-unseen links between addiction, suicidal ideation, and the trauma of coming out.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781736021903
Publisher:	Mark A Turnipseed
Publication date:	01/01/2021
Pages:	238
Sales rank:	1,088,646
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.54(d)

About the Author

Introducing Mark A. Turnipseed, a trailblazing figure in the realm of personal development and wellness. As a renowned best-selling author and former mental health counselor based in Montana, he possesses a profound reservoir of knowledge and experience that fuels his role as an exceptional life coach. Mark's voyage commenced with a profound understanding of the human psyche, and over time, he has honed a specialized program of personal reinvention that has profoundly impacted the lives of countless individuals, including his own. Mark's driving passion lies in empowering others to embrace holistic wellness, spirituality, and physical fitness. This fervor led him to establish a thriving social platform, where he disseminates wisdom and ignites positive change. Through his unique insights and transformative teachings, he has emerged as a beacon of hope for those yearning to lead a fulfilling and purpose-driven existence. Beyond his influential coaching, Mark stands as the visionary CEO and Cofounder of Halo42, a groundbreaking skincare line that celebrates the essence of inner beauty. His mission is to inspire others to embrace their true selves, fostering the confidence to uplift and support those around them, thus making the world a more beautiful place. Mark's approach to well-being is an intricate tapestry, drawing from extensive research and clinical experience in exercise science, nutrition, spirituality, and psychology. With an enchanting fusion of ancient wisdom from Chinese and Ayurvedic traditions and contemporary practices, he crafts transformative lifestyles. A captivating orator, author, and life coach, Mark delivers resonant messages that reach audiences worldwide. With his empowering guidance and effervescent personality, he kindles the inner radiance within every individual he encounters. Embark on an enthralling expedition of self-discovery and transformation with Mark A. Turnipseed's writing. Let him illuminate the path to a life enriched with purpose, wellness, and the sheer joy of authentically sparkling from within. Join the movement and embrace the journey to a more fulfilling existence.

Editorial Reviews

"Mark Turnipseed's My Suicide Race is a harrowing roller-coaster ride of a read, full of unexpected twists, turns, and bone-chilling drops. Charting one man's emotional journey from childhood to rock-bottom addict, you'll cheer as Turnipseed finally faces his demons by reaching deep into his soul, finding redemption in his children and by embracing his true self."

-Kergan Edwards-Stout, author of the award-winning books, Never Turn Your Back on the Tide and Songs for the New Depression."

"For so many who are caught in the crosshairs of faith and sexual orientation, "religion" can be deadly. Incredibly personal, poignant, deeply tragic and yet ultimately triumphant, Mark Turnipseed's extraordinary memoir MY SUICIDE RACE should be mandatory reading for anyone who has struggled with addiction, internalized homophobia, or any other mental health challenges which caused them to question who God made them to be."

-Daniel Karslake, Critically acclaimed producer/director of "For the Bible Tells Me So"

"Look up "hero's journey," and see the face of this young man who conquered addiction through triathlon training to name himself proudly as gay. It's painfully and joyfully told in this remarkably honest book."

-Brian McNaught Author On Being Gay, Now That I'm Out, What Do I Do? and LGBTQ Rights Activist

From the Publisher

2021-03-03
A debut memoir takes on a host of complicated issues involving sexual orientation, religion, rape, sex work, and addiction.

In his introduction, Turnipseed makes an arresting statement: “My lies began when I was six years old, and throughout my childhood and many years of my adult life, I tried to build a house on a foundation of those lies.” The confession will resonate with readers who, like the author, have hidden crucial parts of themselves from others in fear of reprisals. In the pages that follow, he makes his anguish and turmoil palpable as he recalls struggling with his sexuality in a devoutly Christian household, being raped as a teenager, abusing drugs, and secretly pursuing sex work while married. But what sets this book apart from memoirs with similar themes is his ability to explain how trauma, shame, and coping mechanisms can mutually reinforce one another. Readers will come to understand how Turnipseed used sex and drugs in an effort to deaden his emotional pain, and how that had far-reaching consequences for him and his loved ones, including two wives and two children. At one point, he shows how something as simple as a hiking excursion with a man he’s attracted to becomes a fraught situation: “I tried to play it cool, but without drugs or booze, that was unnatural for me. It was intolerably uncomfortable.” Turnipseed sometimes excessively employs similes to make his points; at one juncture, for instance, he compares his mental state to walking in a “lava field” before he came out as gay and to walking in a strawberry field afterward. However, other comparisons are impressively well crafted, as when he describes yellow sofa cushions that “balloon out like the distended belly of an aging diabetic.” There are many poignant moments throughout the text, such as an account of the unexpected reactions he received upon coming out to his all-male sobriety group. The author eventually found salvation in the Ironman athletic phenomenon—the perfect metaphor for the healing of body, mind, and spirit, as moving forward under grueling conditions requires intense discipline and offers immensely satisfying rewards.

A powerful story of redemption after numerous challenges and stumbles.

Kirkus Reviews