On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World

by Danya Ruttenberg Narrated by Sara Sheckells

Overview

Winner NATIONAL JEWISH BOOK AWARDS in Contemporary Jewish Life & Practice
Myra H. Kraft Memorial Award

A crucial new lens on repentance, atonement, forgiveness, and repair from harm-from personal transgressions to our culture's most painful and unresolved issues.

American culture focuses on letting go of grudges and redemption narratives instead of the perpetrator's obligations or recompense for harmed parties. As survivor communities have pointed out, these emphases have too often only caused more harm. But Danya Ruttenberg knew there was a better model, rooted in the work of the medieval philosopher Maimonides.

For Maimonides, upon whose work Ruttenberg elaborates, forgiveness is much less important than the repair work to which the person who caused harm is obligated. The word traditionally translated as repentance really means something more like return, and in this book, returning is a restoration, as much as is possible, to the victim, and, for the perpetrator of harm, a coming back, in humility and intentionality, to behaving as the person we might like to believe we are.

Maimonides laid out five steps: naming and owning harm; starting to change/transformation; restitution and accepting consequences; apology; and making different choices. Applying this lens to both our personal relationships and some of the most significant and painful issues of our day, including systemic racism and the legacy of enslavement, sexual violence and harassment in the wake of #MeToo, and Native American land rights, On Repentance and Repair helps us envision a way forward.

Rooted in traditional Jewish concepts while doggedly accessible and available to people from any, or no, religious background, On Repentance and Repair is a book for anyone who cares about creating a country and culture that is more whole than the one in which we live, and for anyone who has been hurt or who is struggling to take responsibility for their mistakes.

Editorial Reviews

NOVEMBER 2022 - AudioFile

Sara Sheckells correctly describes her delivery style as “equal parts empathetic and authoritative,” and that is the case with this somewhat academic performance. Sheckells confidently lays out Rabbi Ruttenberg’s expansive discussion of the ancient Jewish philosopher Maimonides’s five steps to repentance and their application to individuals, communities, and cultures. Centered on the concept of caring for and inflicting no further harm on a victim, this audiobook is best consumed a bit at a time since the material is complex and sometimes makes for uncomfortable listening. Examples are given of repentance—some successful, some not—by individuals as well as nations. South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, Germany’s attempts at penitence for the Holocaust, and the few reparations made to Indigenous communities in the U.S. are some of the examples. S.G. © AudioFile 2022, Portland, Maine

From the Publisher

Ruttenberg’s book sets out guidelines for full-hearted repentance—the kind of atonement that people should do, but often don’t.”
—Sandra Collins, Library Journal

“Excellent, necessary . . . Her careful and thoughtful writing frequently includes the voices of others, centering the needs of victims and holding the words of perpetrators to account.”
—Emily Dziuban, Booklist

“A must-read for anyone navigating the work of justice and healing.”
—Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley

"Although the book is based in Jewish concepts, it’s really a book for anyone looking to see how our society can acknowledge its harm and create the world we’d like to see."
—Jaime Herndon, Bookriot

“[Ruttenberg] is a serious scholar who writes in ways that are accessible and engaging to all.”
—Cathy Corman, Provincetown Independent

“When you read Danya Ruttenberg’s brilliant book, you see with fresh eyes that there is a huge omission in contemporary culture: we don’t have a road map for how someone who’s done harm can change and make amends to others, nor do we discuss why this is necessary for both individual recovery and societal well-being.”
—Rebecca Solnit, author of Orwell’s Roses

“A modern and impressive blueprint for confronting and engaging the effects of harm and the potential for reconciliation.”
—Sherrilyn Ifill, author of On the Courthouse Lawn

“A vital contribution.”
—Soraya Chemaly, author of Rage Becomes Her

Library Journal

07/08/2022

Rabbi Ruttenberg's (Surprised by God: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Religion; The Passionate Torah: Sex and Judaism) latest book, a study of atonement and forgiveness, opens with a content warning: survivors of trauma, assault, racism, ableism, and genocide, take heed; many of the book's examples of such offenses could be triggering. Readers might recoil from the book's lumping together of these various violations, but the author's concern is genuine. This is a work earnestly demonstrating a path to both repentance and repair. The fulcrum upon which the book rests is Judaism and specifically the 12th-century philosopher Maimonides's systemization of repentance, forgiveness, and atonement. According to Ruttenberg, forgiveness is not possible without the work of repair. And an apology does not necessarily compel a victim's forgiveness. To the book's credit, it plainly recognizes that cultural or social systems cannot force repentance or forgiveness since atonement itself is a theological/devotional act, not necessarily an institutional one. Examples of how not to publicly apologize (Louis C.K.; Germany's reparations over the Holocaust) are easy ones. Missing from Ruttenberg's book is a fulsome consideration of the Catholic Church's shameful response to sexual abuse by clergy. VERDICT Ruttenberg's book sets out guidelines for full-hearted repentance--the kind of atonement that people should do, but often don't.—Sandra Collins

Product Details

BN ID:	2940176107678
Publisher:	Penguin Random House
Publication date:	09/13/2022
Edition description:	Unabridged
Sales rank:	1,083,072

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