Publish This Book: The Unbelievable True Story of How I Wrote, Sold and Published This Very Book

by Stephen Markley

Overview

From the author of Ohio (Best Books of Summer 2018 Selection in Time, Vulture, and the New York Post) comes a brilliant, hilarious, and deeply touching memoir that blows the roof off the genre.

Fed up with the complicated quest of trying to get a book published, Stephen Markley decided to cut to the chase and simply write a memoir about trying to publish a book—this book, to be precise. It's the most "meta" experiment he's ever untaken, and like a Mobius strip in book form, the concept is circular, self-indulgent, and—maybe, possibly, hopefully—brilliant.

For fans of Dave Eggers and David Sedaris, Publish This Book is the modern day saga of an idealistic, ambitious, audacious, unyielding young writer who is tired of waiting his turn. Like any work that claims gleefully to be about nothing, it's really about pretty much everything—sex, drugs, politics, pop-culture, ex-girlfriends and sexy vampires. From the hope of early adulthood to the rage of life's many (unavoidable) disappointments, it is a story of overcoming the obstacles and discovering a happy ending at last.

Most importantly, it's a story that will inspire readers to find their true voice in their work and in their life.

Praise for Stephen Markley:

"Markley seems clever and funny, but it may be his "fire" that ultimately makes him worthwhile." — Literary Chicago

"Compelling, emotionally resonant passages . . ." — Publishers Weekly

"Markley is a knockout storyteller" — Kirkus Reviews

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781402247170
Publisher:	Sourcebooks
Publication date:	03/01/2010
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	480
File size:	1 MB

About the Author

Stephen Markley is an author, screenwriter, and journalist. A graduate of the Iowa Writer's Workshop, Markley's previous books include the memoir Publish This Book: The Unbelievable True Story of How I Wrote, Sold, and Published This Very Book, and the travelogue Tales of Iceland. He lives in Los Angeles.

Stephen Markley is an author, screenwriter, and journalist. A graduate of the Iowa Writer’s Workshop, Markley’s previous books include the memoir Publish This Book: The Unbelievable True Story of How I Wrote, Sold, and Published This Very Book, and the travelogue Tales of Iceland. He lives in Los Angeles.

Read an Excerpt

Excerpt from Chapter One: The Gist

I had two ways to start this book. In the first, I would tell a completely irrelevant and unnecessary anecdote that would nevertheless say something about what kind of book this would be.
Something like:
One day in college I was sitting in my room, when my roommate Scott burst out of the bathroom, half of his face still covered in shaving cream, and declared, as if he had just figured out time travel, "You know what they need to invent? A machine that lets you shave and take a shit at the same time." I stared at him for a moment, my mind racing as I envisioned all kinds of complicated gizmos (my composite notion included some type of suctioning tubing and a robotic razor arm), before
I realized that what he was describing could be "invented" quite easily by building a sink and mirror facing a toilet. Despite being two members of Miami University's elite honors department, this was the typical level of intellectual discourse in our apartment. Whenever I hear politicians say something trite about how our young people are the future, I think of Scott.
So that was one option. My second choice would be something stark, bold, and declarative like:
"My name is Stephen Markley, and I'm a writer."
Obviously, I had trouble deciding which way to go, so here we are nearly half a page later already feeling like this is the beginning of some epic disaster-the Iraq war of book openings.[1] Let me try one last time:
My name is Stephen Markley, and I call myself many things-son, brother, friend, Cavs fan, erudite,[2] liberal, incompetent,
Buckeye, OSU fan, emotionally distant, Blazers fan, sexually adequate well over 40 percent of the time-but first and foremost, I call myself a writer.
I guess that designation depends on how you define a "writer."
Hell, plenty of people write-maybe in a daily journal or a blog or perhaps they fiddle with poetry or simply jot down notes and amusing anecdotes. Basically everyone occasionally records something for posterity.[3]
Most people, however, do not consider a person who simply writes to be a "writer." No, I am a writer in the sense that I want someone to pay me for my unrelenting genius. I want some poor bastard to plop down between seven and fifteen dollars for my sentences because I've demonstrated the mesmerizing ability to match nouns with verbs and, occasionally, adjectives. If you're reading this, then that poor bastard is likely you, so I thank you for spending money on my humble insights, my analysis of the human condition.[4]

[1] Too soon? That was probably too soon.
[2] I didn't actually know what that word meant when I wrote it. Thank you,
Microsoft Word thesaurus tool...
[3] I don't want to get too philosophical here, but once you commit a thought to paper it takes on a separate life from the organism it was while living inside your head. While in your head, this thought is like a high school dropout taking bong rips in his parents' basement. Once committed to paper, however, this thought becomes a college graduate with a degree in marketing, a thought who has even begun to date a respectable girl. In other words, this thought now has a future.
[4] I apologize in advance for the profanity, violence, pornographic digressions, and for calling you a poor bastard just then. That was definitely out of line.

Table of Contents

One: The Gist, 1

Two: Where to Begin, 11

Three: Chicago-Based Freelance Writer, 29

Four: The Parts of This Book that Belong in the Toilet, 51

Five: Nick Hornby Must Be in This Book, 69

Six: Forget This Book, 83

Seven: Autobiographical Digression #1: Leaving Behind the Skin from Your Knees, 99

Eight: How to Get Rejected, 119

Nine: And in the Meantime Life Goes On, 135

Ten: Chicago Cold, 155

Eleven: And the Good News?, 173

Twelve: The Call, 193

Thirteen: Autobiographical Digression #2: Confessions of a Campus Firebrand, 219

Fourteen: Whose Opinion Counts, 247

Fifteen: Please Don't Fact-Check This Chapter, 269

Sixteen: Expansive, Self-Critical, Honest, Jumpy, Surprising, Self-Confident, Cynical, Smart, and Very, Very Funny, 299

Seventeen: Wrong-Headed, Condescending Toward the Reader, Self-Involved, and Unintentionally Revealing, 311

Eighteen: Never Start a Story with Dialogue, 327

Nineteen: The Chapter I Called "Wildheart," 347

Twenty: The Footnotes, 373

Twenty-one: So You Know What Happens with This Book, 381

Twenty-two: Autobiographical Digression #3: Why We Write, 403

Twenty-three: This Book, Published, 435

Epilogue: The Wrap-Up, 451

Acknowledgments, 463

About the Author, 471

Editorial Reviews

It doesn’t matter what problems you’ve got with Markley’s sprawling, self-referential account of his efforts to sell a book about his efforts to sell the book he’s writing at that very moment—he’s already anticipated your criticisms, from the imperfect echoes of writers like Dave Eggers and Chuck Klosterman to the preponderance of dick jokes and other forms of frat boy humor. “Of course, on a basic level, the book is a stupid idea,” he admits early on; later, he concedes, “I’ve just been winging it, and it shows.” He might have been better off cutting down some of the more self-indulgent sections, like a minihistory of his tenure as a “political sex columnist” for his college paper or an exploration of the fake memoir phenomenon featuring made-up conversations with Chicago drug dealers and underprivileged high school students. But there are compelling, emotionally resonant passages, too: a reflection on what it’s like to shake loose the influence of a literary mentor, for example, or a best friend’s realization of just how much an unplanned pregnancy has changed his life (Mar.)

Publishers Weekly

"If you like smartass humor thrown at you (and I know you do), you'll enjoy Publish This Book. Hell, even if you don't care about the publishing world at all and just want to laugh at the jackass exploits of a young writer, read the book." — Words from Ward

"Markley seems clever and funny, but it may be his "fire" that ultimately makes him worthwhile." — Literary Chicago

"I love Stephen Markely's writing. Smart, funny." — The Web Town Observer

"The very concept of the book to me is genius, and Stephen's exploration of the boundaries between life and work are riveting." — Blur of the Unsung

"Publish This Book is funny and weird and clever and very entertaining." — Boyfriend News & Reviews

"[A] sprawling, self-referential account of [Markley’s] efforts to sell a book about his efforts to sell the book he’s writing at that very moment… compelling, emotionally resonant passages." — Publishers Weekly

"So far, it’s the most self-indulgent, self-absorbed, self-congratulatory memoir I’ve ever read… and I’m loving every minute of it." — Las Vegas Weekly, Clever Boy

"It is ambitious and entertaining. " — Blue Muse Views

"Markley’s voice is honest, sarcastic, intelligent and dirty." — WarningLiterature, a readers corner

"I found the book interesting, irreverently funny and candid." — MelvilleHouseBooks

" I found the book interesting, irreverently funny and candid." — British Bag Company

"I will say that Stephen Markley is a great writer. " — Ezine Articles

"Especially hilarious memoir." — Samixsamx333’s Journal

"Had me in tears of laughter." — The Littlest Soapbox

"Markley has crafted a story that will have you laughing, crying, and laughing until you cry, from the "back cover copy" through the acknowledgments." — E. Christine

From the Publisher

Markley seems clever and funny, but it may be his "fire" that ultimately makes him worthwhile.
— Alba Machado

Literary Chicago

I love Stephen Markely's writing. Smart, funny.
— Terrence Mccarthy

The Web Town Observer

The very concept of the book to me is genius, and Stephen's exploration of the boundaries between life and work are riveting.
— Meg Sung

Blur of the Unsung

Publish This Book is funny and weird and clever and very entertaining.
— Meg Wood

Boyfriend News & Reviews

So far, it's the most self-indulgent, self-absorbed, self-congratulatory memoir I've ever read... and I'm loving every minute of it.
— Rick Lax

Clever Boy Las Vegas Weekly

It is ambitious and entertaining.

Blue Muse Views

Markley's voice is honest, sarcastic, intelligent and dirty.

a readers corner WarningLiterature

I found the book interesting, irreverently funny and candid.

MelvilleHouseBooks

Especially hilarious memoir.
— Sami

Samixsamx333's Journal

Had me in tears of laughter.
— Mike

The Littlest Soapbox

I found the book interesting, irreverently funny and candid.

British Bag Company

I will say that Stephen Markley is a great writer.
— Del Boland

Ezine Articles

Markley has crafted a story that will have you laughing, crying, and laughing until you cry, from the "back cover copy" through the acknowledgments.
— E. Christine

E. Christine