Read an Excerpt
Although the boy was only six years old, he carried himself with the bearing of a small man. Mature beyond his years, he had never allowed anyone to coddle him, much to his mother Carrie's chagrin. At this moment he was angry with both of his older sisters for teasing him by calling him a baby, all because his mother insisted on putting him to bed before the moon was even full in the sky. The three children had been lounging peacefully in their playroom, each engrossed in their own activities until Carrie interrupted them, changing the mood entirely and causing Eddie to become the center of unwanted attention and teasing.
"You're just a baby, Eddie, and babies need plenty of sleep…I'm old enough to know that at least!" Sofia whispered behind her hand, as she pretended to rock her Thumbelina doll to sleep.
Anyway—who you calling baby, Sofia? You're just barely older'n me!"
"You, Eddie…B-A-B-Y!" she spelled out. "And I am two whole years older than you, which makes me way older! If you weren't such a baby you would be able to count!" Sofia chanted gleefully, enjoying torturing her little brother; he was too big for his britches as far as she was concerned.
"Mama…Sofia's calling me the "B" word."
"Oh why don't you stop being such a brat and go on to bed, so we can all have a little peace and quiet?" Odele chimed in with her typical haughty attitude. She was trying to read her Movie Stars fan magazine and all the noise was getting on her nerves. On top of that, the last thing she wanted was her mother to come running to Eddie's defense, as she always did when it came to her son. In Odele's opinion their mother had never displayed love to anyone other than her sons.
If she's not careful God will take this one too, Odele thought and just as quickly tried to banish the thought from her mind. She loved Eddie and never wanted anything to happen to him: it was just that she never understood why her mother's face never lit up for her the way it did for Eddie…the same way it had for her older brother Edward before his death. No matter what she or her sister Sofia did, it was never worthy of more than a nod of approval from their mother. Consequently her sister Sofia chose their father, Logan, as the parent she sought approval from; whenever he was present he could be relied on to freely give all his children approval and affection. The only problem was that, as a prominent minister, he was a very busy man and frequently not at home. Even with Logan's many absences Odele gave him credit for never showing favor for one child over the other. Hearing the sound of her mother's approaching footsteps as her heels tapped on the hardwood floor, Odele buried her face in her magazine, pretending to be too engrossed to be disturbed. Surreptitiously she watched as her mother's eyes quickly assessed the situation.
"Sofia, stop irritating your younger brother—not baby, younger." Smiling at Sofia, she winked conspiratorially while Eddie studied the exchange closely and in his childlike way realized he was being placated and didn't care for it one bit. Without being consciously aware of the impact of his actions, he instinctively responded to regain a position of strength. Emulating their father, the boy stood with his shoulders erect, as he had seen his father do so often in the pulpit, until he knew he had everyone's undivided attention. As it was with his father, so it was with Eddie; within moments every eye was turned toward him. Purposefully ignoring both of his sisters, he stepped forward, grabbed his mother's hand in his and slightly tugged it to indicate she should follow him as he led her from the room. Just as they crossed the threshold, Sofia quickly put her doll in its crib and ran to Eddie, hugging him close. Standing still, he allowed himself to be hugged as though contemplating whether to return her affection. Momentarily he hesitated before yielding. He brushed her hair gently with his small hand, his anger forgotten. As he glanced past Sofia, Eddie's and Odele's gazes locked and fastened; black eyes met hazel with an air of expectancy, and for a moment the air was charged as though both were trying to gauge whether to war or acquiesce. Just as suddenly, the charge left the air, Odele stood up, magazine in hand, feigning a yawn. "I'm tired, too…think I'll go lie in bed and read a little more."
Walking directly to her brother she leaned over and whispered, "If I get scared I'll come and get you. You know…for protection."
"G'night, Mother." Odele walked past Carrie without making eye contact. She was always careful to walk the thin line of respectfulness, although she was never affectionate. "Goodnight, sweetheart." Carrie watched the exchange between her children, always amazed at her son's ability to turn a situation to his advantage. He had a special language with his sisters, always insisting that they respect him. Like many households that had one son among several girls, he was referred to as the little man and was accustomed to being catered to. Carrie hadn't overheard the whispered remark from Odele, but she'd observed her son's response and knew that it had been just what he needed to hear. Looking from Eddie to Odele, she attempted to catch her eyes to nod her approval—but, as customary, her daughter passed her with an air of indifference, uttering a perfunctory goodnight.
At eleven years old, Odele was the most difficult of her children, and Carrie realized that in large part Odele held her directly accountable for her unhappiness. Acknowledging that her daughter was justified, Carrie took full responsibility. Even now she could recall how she had distanced herself from her children after the death of her first child, Edward. Emotionally numb, she had been devoid of the ability to display maternal affection; that was, until she had Eddie…But by then, too many years had passed. Understanding the dynamics that plagued her family, she reasoned that it would take years to repair the damage. Even so, Odele and Sofia's desire for motherly affection and admiration had been negatively affected, each handling the void differently. Odele had created a universe where she was the axis surrounded by a wheel of admirers. By the time she was ten years old, she was emotionally estranged from her family, with Eddie being the sole exception. Sofia attempted to emulate Odele to win her sister's acceptance as a feminine replacement for their mother. At best, Odele seemed to tolerate her sister's efforts, preferring always the company of her elite and snobbish circle of friends. It was a rarity, one that made Carrie's spirits lift, to see her eldest daughter respond kindly to one of her siblings. After the brief exchange with Odele, Eddie had stuck his chest out confidently, and turning back to his mother he whispered, "I'm ready for bed now."
Mystified by her son, she took his hand and walked the few feet from the playroom to his bedroom, thinking that in his own way he had reprimanded his sisters through his actions as though he were a man.
The Daniels" home, in the prosperous Third Ward in Houston, Texas, had been designed with a wing of the house just for the children. They each had their own bedroom and private adjoining bathroom. The playroom was located at the entrance to the wing and served as a common area for all the children. Eddie's room was located between Odele's and Sofia's. As Carrie passed by her eldest daughter's room she heard the familiar noise coming from behind the closed door: Odele always dreamed of being an actress, and would often perform in plays at her school. Each evening it was her habit after reading her fan magazines to sit in her bedroom and listen to her favorite radio broadcast, The Shadow. Carrie smiled to herself, she could almost set her watch by Odele's habits.
Once Eddie was tucked into bed, under the quilt made for him by his grandmother Megan, Carrie left the room still thinking of the conversation she'd had with him about his sisters" teasing. "Eddie, your sisters tease you because they love you and that's what older sisters do."
"They should never tease the man of the house; I have to keep them safe," he stated, completely serious, his expression fixed with firmness uncommon to a child. Carrie studied Eddie. His beautiful black eyes, surrounded by sooty lashes, were intensely compelling and uncharacteristically beautiful for a male. Running her fingers through his straight, coalblack hair, she brushed it away from his brow. My son is unlike any child I've had before, she thought to herself; he is more a man than a child. It occurred to her that she had never spoken to him in baby talk or used nicknames as she had done with her other children. As though by unspoken agreement, Carrie respectfully called him Eddie.
Unwavering, Eddie's eyes held his mother's, compelling her to reply. "Eddie, you are the man of the house when your father is not here. As for our safety, now that's the last thing I want you to worry about. We are safe."
Eddie continued to study his mother, intently weighing her words; she noted a shift in his eyes, signaling he had arrived at a decision. Instinctively she knew from his expression that he did not agree with her.
"Goodnight, Mama…I love you."
Leaning forward, Carrie kissed her son's brow. "I love you too, son…Mama loves you too."
Listening for the click of the door as it closed, Eddie lay staring out the window, deep in thought. She doesn't know about the monsters, that's why she thinks she's safe. Pulling the radio from the nightstand he placed it on his bed under the covers. Adjusting the dial, he repositioned the antenna so he could hear the broadcast. Eagerly waiting for the show, he listened with bated breath; anxious for the adventures of The Shadow to begin, he hummed to the commercial. "Brylcream…A little dab'll do ya!" As the show began he leaned forward, his nose almost touching the small speaker in the radio, so intently did he pay attention, as his imagination let him see the broadcast on the screen of his mind's eye. Chills ran down his spine as he listened to the familiar refrain, indicating the program had come to an end.
"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows!" Letting out a sigh of relief, Eddie returned the radio to its place on the nightstand and stared out his window hypnotically. Fighting to stay awake, he hoped Odele would be too scared to sleep alone tonight. Finally, unable to stay awake any longer, he gave in to the lure of sleep. In his dreams he pictured himself as the hero who rescues his sisters and mother from The Shadow…Eddie slipped into a deep sleep, only to be awakened a short while later by real screams that were not coming from his radio.
"No! Please stop, Logan…please!…Stop…please!"
Not certain whether he was dreaming or awake, for a moment he thought the screaming was right outside his door. Disoriented, filled with an indescribable sense of dread, Eddie automatically wanted to do as any six-year-old awakened in unfamiliar circumstances would. Tears immediately sprang to his eyes and his mouth opened to cry out for his mother—but then he stopped short, recalling that only babies cried. Again he heard a scream, then muffled cries. Jumping from his bed he ran in the direction of the sound. His knees felt weak, but his determination to be brave overcame his fear. Running down the hall toward his parents" room, he gave a startled cry when someone grabbed his arm, pulling him unceremoniously into a room where he came face to face with Odele, her face red and swollen from crying. He saw Sofia also crying softly, sitting on the bed.
"Sssh! Be quiet, it will be over soon…Eddie, just stay with us—we'll protect you," Odele whispered.
Shaken, Eddie broke free from her grasp, staring at his sisters in stunned disbelief. His awareness shifted and his vision blurred like a blind man's and he lost sight of them. Their fear was so palpable it filled his senses until he could taste the bile in his throat.
There's a monster in my house and I have to protect them from it, he thought with childlike rationale. Wrenching free from Odele's grasp he ran from the room toward the sound without a backward glance, determined to find his mother. He was sure she needed his immediate protection. Heart hammering in his chest, Eddie stood in the hallway, listening keenly for the monster…the same monster he'd imagined dwelling in the recesses of his closet. Hearing a thud coming from his parents" room, he walked woodenly toward the sound. With each step he readied himself to face the monster, fully expecting it to jump out and confront him at any given moment… that is, until he came face to face with it. Turning the knob silently, he entered the room, hoping to launch a surprise attack. His eyes as large as saucers, Eddie's knees weakened and his bowels turned to water as the monster came into full view.
To his horror the monster and his father were the same person, almost. The monster must have transformed into his father; this disheveled man-beast standing before him was barely recognizable to the boy. Eddie had never seen his father in his present condition, his hair mussed, his cheeks flushed beet-red and his eyes bloodshot from rage, reeling in anger at the audacity of someone entering the room. Logan turned toward the door, demanding, "What do you want, boy? Get the hell outta here—I'm talking to your mama!"
Jumping in fright, Eddie's gaze fastened on the naked form on the floor and the realization washed over him that the bruised, disfigured woman was in fact his beloved mother. "Do you hear me, boy?"
Eddie could not miss the underlying tone, insinuating imminent danger, but still he remained. No monster was going to get his mother. "Uh-uh, monster-Daddy, you're not talking…Mommy's hurt! I'm here to save her!"
Logan's lips curled in disgust, the veins in his neck pulsing dangerously. "Save her? Save her? Why, boy…I'm the only one that can save her! I'm gonna beat all hell out of her. Save her? Even God couldn't save her from being a whore!"
Although he didn't understand the barrage of insults, the word whore was stored in his memory to be retrieved later, when he could fully understand its meaning.
This event would forever change Eddie; without his knowledge or permission, his view of marriage and relationships would always remain scarred by his father's accusations and his mother's actions. No matter how much Eddie loved his mother, women were whores. This event impacted his ability to love, trust and respect a woman. Despite what he saw unfold, he always remembered what he heard and what followed.
Unable to reconcile the scene that played out before him, Eddie saw his father as the embodiment of The Shadow, pure evil, a monster. As though a spell had been broken, he mutely ran toward the monster disguised as his father, fists flailing wildly, intent on stopping this attack against his mother. Bravely he stood up against his father, receiving Logan's wrath in order to save his mother from the savagery of his rage.
No longer able to hide in their rooms after their brother's departure, Odele and Sofia followed in his wake. He attacked the monster moments before they entered the room. Hearing his sisters" screams of horror, he was momentarily confused, looking around, he fully expected another monster to show itself. The young boy fought wildly, trying with all his might to physically disable his monster-father and interrupt the attack against his mother.
Blinded by anger and jealously, Logan regarded his son's assault as a personal affront and fought him like an adversary instead of his own child. At first he willfully ignored the cries and pleas from his wife and daughters to have mercy and stop his attack on his son, intending to stop short after he taught him to stay out of grown folks'business. He had almost come to his senses when, in an attempt to save Eddie, Odele jumped on Logan's back, scratching his face and pulling his hair. "Leave him alone!" she screamed maniacally. For the first time in her life Odele's loyalty had been challenged—and she and started biting and scratching Logan, demanding Eddie's release. Determined not to be defeated, Logan fell back into the wall, knocking the wind from Odele and causing her to slide from his back. Swinging around wildly, he kicked Carrie, a satisfied smirk lighting his face when she doubled over, becoming motionless. Turning his full attention toward his son, completely unsympathetic, Logan's face contorted grotesquely as he released a guttural scream of rage. Terrified, Eddie felt his bladder release even before Logan's hand connected with his jaw. Logan, gaping in stunned silence, watched his son sail across the room, his small frame smashing headfirst into the wall. Sanity returned to Logan immediately and with painful clarity, his scream of rage becoming shrieks of grief and remorse.
In a span of milliseconds Eddie's eyes filled with tears of shame. He had not been able to help his mother…. He could even hear her screaming his name. Somehow she was drowning out the monster. Without warning he felt his neck snap forward as his head hit the wall. Letting go, he sought the solace of unconsciousness and the company of the Shadow killer. Later in life when he became a man, he would recall that night—not because of the beating…but because of what came after.
