"The noted composer and doyen of modern opera writes, brilliantly, of the many obstacles life has thrown in his path . . . A superb memoir that reveals the pleasures—but far more, the pains—of the creative life." —Kirkus Reviews (starred review)
"This is a big book, both literally and figuratively, full of big emotions and bigger tragedies, shameful secrets and bodily obsessions as well as the thrill of creativity, the sadness of ordinary life, and all the other moments in-between. By his conclusion, he wonders if sharing his life with the world is worth it. Might it be useful to someone? It is this generosity of spirit that is perhaps this book’s greatest virtue." —June Sawyers, Booklist
"In an autobiography that is at once heartbreaking and heartwarming, distressing and inspiring, bone-chilling and at times humorous, Ricky Ian Gordon tells the story of his life as a composer, with all of its immense difficulties and stellar successes. . . An intimate journey into the roller-coaster life of an outstanding contemporary artist." —Thomas Bohlert, The East Hampton Star
"Gordon’s book isn’t just a memoir; it’s a guide. It offers insights and encouragement to anyone involved in creative work, showing that the struggles behind the scenes are often as significant as the final product, whether that product is a human (Gordon) or made for the opera stage. . . A powerful book full of intricate details about his life, with stories that will break your heart and lift your spirits." —Chris Ruel, OperaWire
"With Seeing Through: A Chronicle of Sex, Drugs, and Opera, Ricky Ian Gordon controls his own narrative by shockingly telling the truth. In this day and age, that feels like a miracle." —Kelli O'Hara
"The immensely talented Ricky Ian Gordon has written a memoir that is at times hilarious, harrowing and most importantly insightful into the mind and process of a serious composer of classical and contemporary musical theater." —James Lapine, author of Putting It Together: How Stephen Sondheim and I Created "Sunday in the Park with George"
"Ricky Ian Gordon’s Seeing Through is a remarkable story about the considerable effort it takes to be an artist and a human being, simultaneously. It’s dark, it’s funny, it’s intimate and it’s profound." —Michael Cunningham, author of Day
"Honest and complex . . . The memoir’s reflections on music, Gordon’s creative process, and anecdotes from the artistic arena are especially captivating." —Carol J. Binkowski, Library Journal
"With candor abounding, Ricky Ian Gordon sings the engrossing song of himself. What a lot he has survived! What a lot he has surmounted! I could read him forever." —Benjamin Taylor, author of Chasing Bright Medusas: A Life of Willa Cather
"I have never read a more candid and engrossing memoir than Seeing Through. Told in vivid detail, Ricky's story is poignant, entertaining, and ultimately inspirational." —William C. Carter, author of Marcel Proust: A Life
"[A] mesmerizing new memoir. . . Unfiltered as a Pall Mall. . . I am glad to have so thoroughly enjoyed "Seeing Through." " —Alexandra Jacobs, The New York Times
"Composers of opera are compelling storytellers. Ricky Ian Gordon is a master of the art—not only in his songs and operas, but also in this riveting, candid autobiography. . . It’s this directness and honesty that makes his writing so appealing, and it’s his sensitivity to human frailties that makes his observations so acute." —Bob Goldfarb, Jewish Book Council
"Ricky’s life story, described in his new memoir Seeing Through: A Chronicle of Sex, Drugs, and Opera, makes centuries-old myths pale in comparison. . . Blanketed by his characteristic warmth and humor." —Liza Lentini, SPIN
05/01/2024
In his honest and complex memoir, Gordon digs deep into his background—youth, family, coming-of-age, and beyond—to analyze his life, obstacles, and creative direction. After receiving a childhood giftbook of opera stories, his passion for this art form took hold. It blossomed with recordings, live performances, studies, and compositions. He grew to embrace an eclectic range of other musical forms. Concurrently, his life progressed with personal turmoil, including a substance use condition, grief over losing friends and a beloved partner to AIDS, distress over family issues, and the challenging quest to secure a place in the mercurial world of music. He emerges as a gifted creator; his acclaimed compositional output—operas, such as The Grapes of Wrath, art songs and instrumental and theatrical works—has been presented by leading artists and performing groups. The memoir's reflections on music, Gordon's creative process, and anecdotes from the artistic arena are especially captivating. VERDICT A unique and detailed self-portrait that will prompt readers to seek recordings of Gordon's innovative works. The discography and lists of compositions and publications are thorough and helpful.—Carol J. Binkowski
★ 2024-05-15
The noted composer and doyen of modern opera writes, brilliantly, of the many obstacles life has thrown in his path.
“Music, sex, and addiction have intersected or collided in my life, catalysts for confusion, beauty, and restlessness.” So writes Gordon, the author of such acclaimed operas as The Garden of the Finzi-Continis and My Life With Albertine. The music runs throughout this episodic memoir as “the cause of most of my joy in life, as well as much of my unhappiness. Sometimes it’s a bed of nails, at others, a field of clouds.” It does not emerge easily, but when it does, it often does gloriously, fed by a diet that includes Neil Young and Joni Mitchell as well as Paul Hindemith, Olivier Messiaen, and Stephen Sondheim. As to the last composer, Gordon writes about a tangled relationship that began and ended with admiration but numerous missteps, including getting drunk enough in his home “to go vomit so violently [that a friend] has to peel me up off the floor of the bathroom.” Gordon’s reconciliation with Sondheim is one of many supremely touching moments in a text laced with pain: the loss of friends, family, and lovers to AIDS, addiction, and age. Regarding AIDS, Gordon’s frontline memoir is as valuable as Larry Kramer’s. He writes that as a caregiver, he had essentially been given carte blanche from the medical community to commit murder when the suffering became too great to bear: “We were all basically assigned euthanasia, and it was up to us to decide when to do it.” Gordon’s scars are many, but clearly he has recovered from those wounds, as from his addictions, well enough to produce a body of work that, though born in difficulty, is revelatory all the same.
A superb memoir that reveals the pleasures—but far more, the pains—of the creative life.