Texts from Jane Eyre: And Other Conversations with Your Favorite Literary Characters

by Mallory Ortberg Narrated by Zach Villa, Amy Landon

Overview

Mallory Ortberg, cocreator of the cult-favorite Web site The Toast, presents this whimsical collection of hysterical text conversations from your favorite literary characters.



Everyone knows that if Scarlett O'Hara had an unlimited text-and-data plan, she'd constantly try to tempt Ashley away from Melanie with suggestive messages. If Mr. Rochester could text Jane Eyre, his ardent missives would obviously be in all-caps. And Daisy Buchanan would not only text while driving, she'd text you to pick her up after she totaled her car.



Based on the popular Web feature, Texts from Jane Eyre is a witty, irreverent mash-up that brings the characters from your favorite books into the twenty-first century.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

09/15/2014
Humorist Ortberg offers a side-splitting take on famous literary characters from Gilgamesh to Hermione Granger by peeking into their imagined text messages, replete with emoticons, misspellings, and irregular punctuation. Some exchanges update well-known plot points—Goneril intercepts texts from Regan on Edmund’s phone and Gertrude offers to bring a tuna sandwich to Hamlet’s room. Others exaggerate character traits, like Scarlett O’Hara egging on Ashley to guess what corset she’s wearing, or Cathy and Heathcliff one-upping each other about the respective desperation of their love for each another. Ortberg keeps the joke fresh with jabs at various canonical authors, portraying Coleridge interrupted while composing Kubla Khan by “some asshole from Porlock” and Thoreau busily inviting friends and ordering supplies to his “self-sufficient” retreat to the woods. Ortberg gets the most mileage whenever she plays a quirky artist off a nonplussed straight man, whether it’s T.S. Eliot’s friend explaining “I can’t leave work to buy you a peach” or William Carlos Williams’s long-suffering wife reading his note that says, “i have eaten the little red wheelbarrow/ that was in the icebox.” Ortberg charmingly captures, in short, palatable bytes, what is most memorable about famous books and their indelible characters. (Nov.)

From the Publisher

In Texts from Jane Eyre Mallory Ortberg hilariously proves that she understands fictional characters better than they understand themselves. She makes me laugh like no one else.” —Rainbow Rowell, bestselling author of Eleanor & Park and Fangirl

“Dear Mallory Ortberg's Publisher: Please send me 27 cases of Texts from Jane Eyre, because I ate it like it was candy coated in crack cocaine, it's the best, and I need to give it to everyone.” —Elizabeth Gilbert, bestselling author of Eat, Pray, Love and The Signature of All Things

“Witty and literate. Smart-ass humor with an emphasis on smart. I'm not sure who I'm more jealous of: Mallory Ortberg for her comic brilliance, or whoever got to sit next to her in high school English.” —Adam Bertocci, author of Two Gentlemen of Lebowski

“Mallory Ortberg is actually, literally the funniest person on the internet. It turns out she has also read everything. This is the smartest, most highbrow, most sophisticated literary book that will ever make you pee yourself in public.” —Rachel Fershleiser, co-editor of Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure

“[A] splendid and wry work of humor writing...Texts from Jane Eyre is to literary culture what The Daily Show is to politics: both use satire to expose the contradictions and absurdity enabling powerful figures.” —Los Angeles Review of Books

“What if the greatest characters in literary history all carried around smartphones and typed out messages to each other?...[A] highbrow yet subversive sensibility” —NPR Morning Edition

“These informal, off the cuff missives are true to each character's voice, as Ortberg understands them deeply—and the result is hilarious...Don't resist. Just give in to this crazy, wonderful book.” —Bustle.com

“Humorist Ortberg offers a side-splitting take on famous literary characters from Gilgamesh to Hermione Granger by peeking into their imagined text messages...Ortberg charmingly captures, in short, palatable bytes, what is most memorable about famous books and their indelible characters.” —Publishers Weekly

“Ortberg finds a way of lampooning the ridiculous characters of the past (both fictional and non fiction) thanks to her endless knowledge of and passion for western literature and history and her sharp humor.” —BUST Magazine

“[Texts from Jane Eyre] is a treasure trove of weird literary jokes which, to be honest, are our favorite kind.” —Brooklyn Magazine

“Each [text conversation] brings a contemporary sensibility to timeless publications of yore. Be prepared to LOL—literally.” —Los Angeles Magazine

“Anyone who is really into the classics and also has a sense of humor will appreciate [Texts from Jane Eyre]. It will make a great holiday present.” —BookRiot's "In the Mailbag"

“[T]his book is a literary aficionado's dream!...This compendium of witty and absolutely charming text messages from and to characters that we all know...had me laughing out loud and rereading over and over again.” —Thereviewbroads.com

“[A] super-funny book that envisions what text conversations would be like with your favorite literary legends...I recommend you pick up Texts from Jane Eyre for any book lover with a sense of humor (and maybe a cell phone.)” —Zulkey.com

“Just in time to complete your Christmas shopping...Read it and send your AP English teacher a thank-you note. ” —Jezebel.com

“This makes me laugh...Cliff's Notes seem so wordy now, don't they?” —Houston Chronicle

From the Publisher - AUDIO COMMENTARY

"This is the best kind of English-major humor. There's not a weak point in the book; it's terrific, snicker-inducing fun throughout." —Library Journal Starred Review

Library Journal - Audio

04/15/2015
Originally released online as individual posts, Ortberg's first book satirizes much of the Western literary canon—from classical Greece to The Baby-Sitters Club—in the form of text messages. The author follows the same format for most of the exchanges: one grounded party is perplexed by the antics of the crazy-melodramatic-homicidal-arrogant-nonsensical literary or cultural giant with whom they are texting. In Ortberg's hands, Heathcliff and Cathy try to outdo each other with descriptions of how vicious and gruesome their shows of love will be, and "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" sounds even more absurd, while Hamlet is portrayed as a moody teenager and Jo from Little Women keeps thinking that her father must surely be dead. Narrators Amy Landon and Zach Villa handle the range of accents and time periods very well, as well as the variety of self-absorbed characters they are called upon to play. VERDICT Recommended for libraries looking to expand their humor offerings. The work will appeal to anyone seeking bite-sized absurdity in audio format. ["Bibliophiles who enjoy their humor laced with snark will be thrilled to find this book," read the starred review of the Holt hc, LJ 11/1/14.]—Anna Mickelsen, Springfield City Lib., MA

JANUARY 2015 - AudioFile

For those who wonder how famous literary characters would text each other, author Mallory Ortberg and narrators Zach Villa and Amy Landon address that curiosity with their fanciful conceit. From Lord Byron to Nancy Drew, Villa and Landon deliver textual banter, bringing out the humorous and the ludicrous in every exchange. What listeners lose in emoticons and acronyms, they gain in verbal irony and other vocal techniques the narrators employ in their performance. While some of the conversations are a little stilted because of their brevity, they’re short enough that the book never lags. For literati who like their fiction tongue in cheek, this one will have you ROTFL. C.A. 2016 Audies Finalist © AudioFile 2015, Portland, Maine

Product Details

BN ID:	2940171010362
Publisher:	Tantor Audio
Publication date:	01/21/2015
Edition description:	Unabridged

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