The Nymphos of Rocky Flats: A Novel

by Mario Acevedo, André Chapoy (Read by)

Overview

The first and only vampire book to be declassified by the federal government . . .

Felix Gomez went to Iraq a soldier. He came back a vampire.

Now he finds himself pulled into a web of intrigue when an old friend prompts him to investigate an outbreak of nymphomania at the secret government facilities in Rocky Flats. He'll find out the cause of all these horny women or die trying! But first he must contend with shadowy government agents, Eastern European vampire hunters, and women who just want his body . . .

Skewering sexual myths, conspiracy fables, and government bureaucracy, The Nymphos of Rocky Flats reveals the bizarre world of the undead with a humorous slant and a fresh twist.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9798874818326
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	09/03/2024
Series:	Felix Gomez Series , #1
Product dimensions:	5.30(w) x 7.50(h) x (d)
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Mario Acevedo is the bestselling author of The Nymphos of Rocky Flats, X-Rated Bloodsuckers, The Undead Kama Sutra, and Jailbait Zombie. He lives and writes in Denver, Colorado.

Jean Carper is a nationally syndicated columnist and a leading authority on health and nutrition. Her columns appear in USA Weekend and King Features Syndicate.

She has authored numerous books, including the bestselling Food—Your Miracle Medicine and The Food Pharmacy.

Formerly an award-winning medical correspondent for CNN, Jean Carper lives in Washington, D.C., and Florida.

 

Check out www.usaweekend.com

Editorial Reviews

Talk about bad breaks. First, Felix Gomez was shuttled off to Iraq. When he arrived, he was a soldier; when he shipped home, he was a vampire. Then, as if things weren't bad enough, he gets pulled into an investigation of an outbreak of nymphomania at the super secret government facilities in Rocky Flats. Vampire noir; fang-in-cheek humor.

The Barnes & Noble Review
The opening lines of The Nymphos of Rocky Flats -- "I don't like what Operation Iraqi Freedom has done to me. I went to the war a soldier; I came back a vampire" -- perfectly sum up the ambiance of this fast-paced and charmingly irreverent blood-sucking mystery.

A decidedly unique twist on the well-trodden vampire mythos, Mario Acevedo's first novel chronicles the adventures of Felix Gomez, a former Army sergeant turned private detective investigating an outbreak of nymphomania (yes, nymphomania!) at a former U.S. Department of Energy nuclear weapons facility in Colorado. When an old college buddy working as the Rocky Flats assistant manager for environmental restoration contacts Gomez with a lucrative -- and downright intriguing -- case revolving around bizarre occurrences of uncontrollable sexual behavior in female employees and a huge government cover-up, the undead detective quickly accepts. But what he thought would be a relatively clear-cut case turns into a massive conspiracy involving radioactive waste, Area 51, extraterrestrial biological entities, fanatical Transylvanian vampire hunters, Tantric mysticism, and, of course, plenty of oversexed women.



Comparable to Andrew Fox's Bride of the Fat White Vampire and Charlie Huston's Already Dead, Acevedo's debut offering -- which has one of the most memorable titles to come along in years! -- marks the unveiling of an ingeniously witty and surprisingly polished storyteller. Fans of authors like Paul Di Filippo, Cory Doctorow, and Steve Aylett will cherish this highly unusual and impressive read. Two fangs up! Paul Goat Allen

bn.com

This debut novel succeeds largely because Acevedo gleefully acknowledges that it takes a lot to make a vampire story interesting anymore. PI Felix Gomez, an ex-soldier who became a vampire while serving in Iraq, uses his supernatural powers to solve mysteries that befuddle mere mortals. When a friend in the Department of Energy asks him to look into an outbreak of nymphomania among female guards at a plutonium processing plant in Colorado, things get really weird: hypnotized personnel talk cryptically about Roswell and something called Project Redlight, trained assassins start decimating the local vampire community and an amorous dryad shows up to assist in the detective work. As though this weren't enough, Felix refuses to drink human blood, an ethical stand that attenuates his uncanny powers and results in intriguing plot complications. Not everything adds up by the book's dizzying finale, but most readers will be too charmed by the crisp style to notice the loose ends. Acevedo doesn't add anything new to the modern vampire tale, but he has a lot of fun sounding its bells and whistles. (Mar.) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.

Publishers Weekly

In Acevedo's debut, vampire P.I. Felix Gomez is asked by old college chum Gilbert Odin, a bureaucrat at Colorado's Rock Flats nuclear facility, to investigate an outbreak of nymphomania among some of the female employees. While interviewing the three ladies first affected by the nymphomania, Felix discovers that the Prozac used to treat their symptoms is no cure-all. Each of them comes on strong to Felix, who cannot easily dissuade them-even with his vaunted vampire powers. Further, the information he manages to glean from them is only partially helpful. Adding to his troubles, and that of other undead in the area, is a gang of Romanian vampire hunters. Time after time, Felix proves to be quite inept at almost any task, and the other nosferatu, including vampire patriarch Bob, are not much better. It is obvious from the title that this is intended to be a humorous treatment of the vampire legend, but while parts of the novel are mildly amusing, most attempts at humor bomb. [This is the first book in a new vampire series.-Ed.]-Patricia Altner, Information Seekers, Columbia, MD Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.

Library Journal

A soldier turned vampire is hired by an alien posing as an old friend to investigate an outbreak of nymphomania at a Department of Energy facility. Seriously. The only thing stranger than this first novel's plot is that it's all rather dull. Falling victim to one of war's least-publicized perils, Felix Gomez returns from Iraq a vampire. While he's not exactly thrilled to have joined the ranks of the undead, his shape-shifting, wall-walking, bullet-absorbing powers do come in handy for his gig as a private investigator. The newly gifted PI gets a chance to put these skills to use when an old buddy-or at least Felix thinks he's an old buddy-asks him to unravel a recent outbreak of nymphomania at the old nuclear weapons plant Rocky Flats. Once at the site, Gomez finds himself pursued on all sides: romantically by a local forest sprite (hey, why not?), somewhat less so by a squad of Romanian vampire-hunters and some shady government types none too pleased by his investigation. Through it all, Acevedo plays it straight, pawning off the most outlandish plot points as if they were nothing but realistic. With the exception of the sex scenes, which read mostly like something taken from the Penthouse Forum slush pile, the prose is pleasantly sharp and to the point. Unfortunately, the book's charms are largely negated by its haphazard structure. Rather than build tension and momentum as it goes, the story hops hurriedly from incident to incident, often moving too quickly to bother with the sort of foreshadowing and detail that might have laid the groundwork for subsequent thrills. Gomez finally gets his man, but by then most readers won't much care. Who knew nymphos could be so boring?

Kirkus Reviews