The Opposite of Certainty: Fear, Faith, and Life in Between

by Janine Urbaniak Reid, Anne Lamott (Foreword by)

Overview

This gripping memoir about what it means to face uncertainty details the plans Janine had for her family and her life that were gutted by her then 10-year-old son Mason’s diagnosis of a cancerous brain tumor, only to be followed by her own cancer diagnosis.

All Janine Urbaniak Reid ever wanted was for everyone she loved to be okay so she might relax and maybe be happy. Her life strategy was simple: do everything right. This included trying to be the perfect mother to her three kids so they would never experience the kind of pain she pretended not to feel growing up. What she didn’t expect was the chaos of an out-of-control life that begins when her young son’s hand begins to shake and he is diagnosed with a brain tumor at age 10.

This moving memoir is the story of Janine’s reluctant journey beyond easy answers and platitudes. She searches for a source of strength bigger than her circumstances, only to have her circumstances become even thornier when she is diagnosed with breast cancer. Drawn deeply and against her will into herself, she discovers hidden reserves of strength, humor, and a no-matter-what faith that looks nothing like she thought it would. The Opposite of Certainty is:

• Brilliant, breathtakingly honest, and sometimes very funny account of marriage, motherhood, and the unfathomable salvation we find in God 
• An unvarnished look at defying the gravity of challenging life circumstances
• The recognition that anyone can tap a source of strength inside themselves to walk through the impossible

Beautifully written and deeply hopeful, Janine shows us how we can come through impossible times transformed and yet more ourselves than we’ve ever allowed ourselves to be.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780785230618
Publisher:	Nelson, Thomas, Inc.
Publication date:	05/12/2020
Sold by:	HarperCollins Publishing
Format:	eBook
Pages:	288
File size:	653 KB

About the Author

Janine Urbaniak Reid was born in Chicago and grew up in California. Before she began raising a family and then writing full-time, she was vice president of a San Francisco public relations firm.

Janine has been published in the Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, and San Francisco Chronicle and is widely syndicated. Hoping to bring humanity into the healthcare discussion by sharing her experience as a mother of a son with a brain tumor, she penned a piece for the Post that went viral. She has been interviewed on national news networks and continues her work as a spokeswoman for healthcare justice.

Janine writes about her imperfect life, what connects us, and addresses the question of what it means to love fiercely in a sometimes dangerous and always uncertain world.

Janine is a graduate of the University of California at San Diego and lives in Northern California with her family and a motley assortment of pets. She attends St. Andrew Presbyterian Church in Marin City: all are welcome.

For more information, please visit JanineUrbaniakReid.com.

Table of Contents

Foreword Anne Lamott ix

An Invitation xi

Nine Years Later xiii

1 Tremors 1

2 Chocolate Eggs and Women in Barbie Doll Blouses 5

3 What's Wrong with This Picture? 13

4 On My Knees 19

5 Boze Grozi 23

6 Inside Out 31

7 When the Walls Come Down 39

8 As the Reflex Takes Over 45

9 Quiet, Clear Yes 51

10 The Unseen Reptile 57

11 Awkward Prayer 65

12 A New Solar System 73

13 Magic Rice 81

14 Reality TV 89

15 Dust into Clay 95

16 Purgatory 101

17 Floods and Mudslides 107

18 Precarious 113

19 Jackson Pollock Faith 119

20 Not Lost 127

21 The Next Right Thing 137

22 Take Off 145

23 Until Tomorrow 151

24 Under Water 163

25 Evidence 169

26 It's Not About the Haircut 177

27 The Weight of Air 183

28 Don't Stop Believing 191

29 Mortals Like Us 199

30 The Other Track 207

31 Urban Legends 215

32 Bread 225

33 Expect 231

34 One-and-a-Half-Pound Prayer 239

35 One of the Guys 247

36 The Charm of Hummingbirds 257

37 Just Dance 265

Acknowledgments 271

About the Author 273

Editorial Reviews

'A beautiful sucker punch, like life. When the ground crumbles beneath your hopes, big dreams, and great expectations, what do you stand on and for? Where do you find the strength to keep going? You find it in this gem of a book.' —Ron Fournier, New York Times bestselling author of Love That Boy

'Full of spiritual grace and shining with a kind of rare hope, yes, it brings you to your knees but miraculously shows you that this might actually be the best vantage point to see the stars. Extraordinary.' —Caroline Leavitt, New York Times bestselling author of Pictures of You and Cruel Beautiful World

'Somedays it's doughnuts and hot coffee. Other days it's gurneys and scans. That's true of almost every full life. Here's the good news: observant and warm, the writing of Janine Urbaniak Reid is the finest company on both kinds of days.' —Kelly Corrigan, New York Times bestselling author of Tell Me More and The Middle Place

'The diagnosis of life-threatening illness is one of the most terrifying challenges any family or individual can face. Anger, resentment, fear, and loneliness rise up ready to do battle with hope, and all are made more powerful by love. The Opposite of Certainty is a deeply personal memoir about such a journey, told with brutal honesty and so much grace it will touch your soul.' —Jacqueline Winspear, award-winning and New York Times bestselling author of Journey to Munich, A Dangerous Place, Leaving Everything Most Loved, and nine other novels featuring Maisie Dobbs

From the Publisher

06/26/2020

Writer Reid's carefully crafted, comfortable, suburban family life was upended abruptly when her younger son began to show vague signs of neurological impairment. Gradually, 13-year-old Mason's headaches and tremors were recognized as the symptoms of a complex brain tumor and the hard-fought equilibrium sought by Reid was disturbed beyond her ability to repair. As her family life was disrupted in ways large and small, all of the coping strategies Reid developed during her own turbulent upbringing fell short when it came to controlling her new circumstances, and she was faced with approaching life from a different perspective. By turns amusing and affecting, this account of one woman's journey to acceptance—if not understanding—provides a graceful meditation on finding refuge in what is already in front of you rather than fighting to create your own reality. VERDICT Reid's saga will appeal to readers seeking a faith-filled approach to confronting the worst that life throws at them.—Thérèse Purcell Nielsen, Huntington P.L., NY

Library Journal

No parent wants to hear the words “your child has a tumor.” In this audiobook, narrator Ginny Welsch captures the frustration, fear, and disbelief of a woman struggling to care for her child who has brain cancer while also struggling to keep her family, herself, and her faith together. Even though Welsch is sharing the powerful words of another woman, her emotional performance makes this audiobook truly personal for the listener. She captures its raw honesty. V.B. © AudioFile 2020, Portland, Maine

JULY 2020 - AudioFile

No parent wants to hear the words “your child has a tumor.” In this audiobook, narrator Ginny Welsch captures the frustration, fear, and disbelief of a woman struggling to care for her child who has brain cancer while also struggling to keep her family, herself, and her faith together. Even though Welsch is sharing the powerful words of another woman, her emotional performance makes this audiobook truly personal for the listener. She captures its raw honesty. V.B. © AudioFile 2020, Portland, Maine

JULY 2020 - AudioFile