Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully

by Elaine Lin Hering

Overview

NATIONAL BESTSELLER

"Unlearning Silence is the book I wish I had when I started my career….This book is going to change the workplace for the better."—Pooja Lakshmin MD, psychiatrist & best-selling author of Real Self-Care

“A necessary read…Unlearning Silence offers an opportunity and tools to change things within and around us – for ourselves and those we love.” —Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

A paradigm-shifting book looking at the pervasive influence of silence and how we can begin to dismantle it in order to find our voices at home and at work

Having a seat at the table doesn’t mean that your voice is actually welcome. Knowing something is wrong doesn't mean it's easy to speak up. In fact, there are incentives for many of us to stay silent. Why speak up if you know that it won’t be received well, and in fact, often makes things worse?

In Unlearning Silence, Hering explores how we’ve learned to be silent, how we’ve benefited from silence, how we’ve silenced other people—and how we might choose another way. She teaches how to recognize and unlearn unconscious patterns so we can make more intentional choices about how we want to show up at home and at work. Only by unlearning silence can we more fully unleash talent, speak our minds, and be more complete versions of ourselves… and help other people do the same.

With compassion, clarity, and understanding, Hering guides readers through real-life examples and offers a concrete road map for doing this vital and challenging work.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780593653609
Publisher:	Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:	03/19/2024
Pages:	288
Sales rank:	242,821
Product dimensions:	8.20(w) x 5.70(h) x 1.20(d)

About the Author

Elaine Lin Hering is a facilitator, speaker, and writer. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. In her career, Elaine has worked on six continents and with a wide range of corporate, government, and nonprofit clients. She has trained mental health professionals, political officials, religious communities, and leaders at companies including American Express, Capital One, Google, Nike, Novartis, Shell, Pixar, and the Red Cross. Elaine is a former Managing Partner of Triad Consulting Group and Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, specializing in dispute resolution, mediation, and negotiation.

Editorial Reviews

"You’ll close the final page of the book feeling more confident than ever to speak up at work, whether it’s in a Slack channel or in your annual review with your boss." —New York Post

"A transformative guide that delves deep into the intricate dynamics of silence, unraveling why individuals often withhold their voices and the subtle ways they unintentionally stifle others. Unlearning Silence is a masterful exploration of the intricate art of communication. Run, don't walk, to read this book. It is such a powerful exploration of voice and the courage and space to use it." —TD Magazine

"A necessary read. With empathy and clarity, Elaine unpacks what makes it so hard to honor ourselves and talk with each other. Unlearning Silence offers an opportunity and tools to change things within and around us – for ourselves and those we love."
—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone and co-host of the Dear Therapists podcast

"Unlearning Silence is the book I wish I had when I started my career. Hering not only proves why silence is toxic, but, critically, goes a step further and shows us how to speak up in a way that is safe, values aligned, and has the greatest chance of being impactful. This book is going to change the workplace for the better."
—Pooja Lakshmin MD, psychiatrist & best-selling author of Real Self-Care

"Too often as women, we are told we are the problem. Books tell us to just be more confident. To show up and then speak up. Elaine goes deeper and shows us that the silence we've been indoctrinated by runs deep and it is what holds us back and makes us feel small. A must read for every leader."
—Deepa Purushothaman, author of The First, The Few, The Only

"We cannot heal our world if we do not unlearn silence. An inviting and essential read."
—Alex Elle, New York Times bestselling author of How We Heal

"Whether we have been socialized to keep quiet, punished for speaking up, or feel panic at the prospect of voicing our truth, our silence deprives the workplace and the world of our ideas and crucial contributions. Elaine Lin Hering’s amazing book provides the secret recipe for breaking silence once and for all! Everyone should read Unlearning Silence—including a lot of men who mute themselves and look the other way when sexism and bias rear their heads." —W. Brad Johnson, PhD, Professor of Leadership, Ethics, and Law, U. S. Naval Academy and coauthor of Good Guys: How Men Can Be Better Allies for Women in the Workplace

"Equal parts informative and inspiring. Unlearning Silence is at the core of negotiation, power, and influence. It is rare to find a book, like this one, that provides practical solutions to the problems it raises. Hering’s expertise is matched only by her empathy." —Alison Fragale, Professor of Organizational Behavior, University of North Carolina Kenan-Flagler Business School

"A balm to my wounded soul..."
—Rev. Danté Upshaw, Program Director & Campus Pastor - Baltimore Urban Studies.

"This is a clear, compassionate read, and an important one.  I’ve rarely felt so seen and understood as when I read these pages. Creativity and innovation flow when people know how to use their voices, and leaders learn how to notice and disrupt patterns of silencing that haunt so many organizations, families and communities."
—Katherine Sarafian, Animation industry senior executive and Academy Award® winning film producer

"Unlearning Silence is a call to action for anyone who has been underestimated, told they shouldn’t speak out, and confined by stereotypes. Elaine has brilliantly pulled together a much needed roadmap for those looking to use the strength of their voice to build the teams, lives, and companies we need, while bringing out the best from the people they lead."
—Eric Toda, Director, Social Marketing at Meta & Managing Director of Meta Prosper

"We can't solve the world's most pressing problems - and innovate our way into the future -  if we perpetually silence ourselves and others. Elaine turns conventional, inadequate advice to "just speak up" into actionable and effective strategies. A game changer for teams and leaders everywhere."
—Dorie Clark, Wall Street Journal bestselling author of The Long Game and Executive Education Faculty, Columbia Business School

"This book will transform your relationship with silence so that your voice can finally be heard!"
—Simon Alexander Ong, author of Energize

"Utterly refreshing, authentic and inspiring. As marginalised voices we can often believe it is our task to forge the way – to speak louder – but in a world full of noise and violence, Elaine Lin Hering’s thoughtful shepherding is a tonic. A majestic and reassuring book."
—Maxine Mei-Fung Chung, author of What Women Want

"Unlearning Silence is a stunning book that empowers readers to break free from the shackles of silence, unlock their inner voice, and put into practice actionable strategies that build confidence in speaking up." —Thomas Curran, Associate Professor, London School of Economics, chartered psychologist, and author of The Perfection Trap

From the Publisher