Whatever's next...it's not 13th grade: A dorm mom's guide for a parent's journey

by Rebecca M Adair

Overview

So your teenager has reached a fork in the road as they finish high school. They could move onto college, or not. How can you as a parent be a positive part of those next steps?

This book can show parents how things work leading up to college and how things work once a student is admitted. Also, if a parent has a student who is not ready or willing—or both—this book can show how to help them figure out the best path that is not college. At least not yet (if ever). And that’s OK! We’ll talk about how to shift expectations of what success looks like for kids and better understand a positive role for the parent.

Author Rebecca Adair spent over 30 years in the higher education system in nearly a half dozen positions. Almost 11 of those years were spent as a dorm mom up-close-and-personal with the struggles of new students adjusting to college life. Often with a helicopter parent merely a call away. "Whatever’s Next, It’s Not 13th Grade" details the trials, successes, and insights she experienced on the front lines both personally and professionally.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781734473704
Publisher:	Show and Tell Products
Publication date:	04/18/2020
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	186
File size:	2 MB

Table of Contents

Table of Contents

 

 

1. Introduction
2. How to use this book
3. How this book can help different groups
4. Why should you listen to me?
5. 2 kids—2 paths
6. My professional experience
7. Ready or not
8. Your background matters
9. How do you get help?
10. What’s the parents’ role?
11. What’s the student’s role?
12. What if not college?

Editorial Reviews

As a mother of an only child who recently made the transition from high school into college, and as someone who works in higher education, I especially appreciated her concrete examples of the times she has supported young people in changing majors, taking a gap year, or doing something other than college altogether. Her candid discussion of how her own children matured along very two different pathways generated a significant aha moment for this mother of one. The list of further resources at the back of the book was helpful too.

Most college support books focus almost solely on academics, how to prepare students to get into college and how to succeed academically once they are there. But what about navigating college life? Living on their own and taking care of themselves is a huge challenge for new students and it can also be a challenge for parents who are not ready to let go. Rebecca Adair focuses specifically on college life, drawing on her experience as a former Hall Director and a parent of college students. She shares personal experiences to drive home key points that really help parents who are trying to find a balance between overbearing and abandoning.



As a parent with a child just starting college, I found the book to offer a helpful perspective with several suggestions that I plan on implementing in the coming years. These included ideas for students and parents and focused on a diverse set of topics from dorm logistics to academic coaching.



Probably the best takeaways from the book for me were specific suggestions on how to give students space- while still moving them forward. If a student has a question, have them find the answer on the website. Train them on the life skills they need to navigate college and beyond- and they will succeed in life. I want my kids to succeed, but this book reminded me I need to allow them to develop the skills to do it.

This is a resource I will go back to again and again as a mom of an 8th grader who will all too soon be making decisions about his path after high school. But it was already really helpful right now. My favorite piece of advice I’m trying every day: asking the kid: “What have you already tried?” before rushing in to fix things. Valuable book, highly recommend.

As a higher education professional who often interacts with students and parents alike, I WISH that all of the parents who wish to be involved in their student’s experience would read this book first. There are so many great lessons to be learned from the author’s experiences as well as the experiences of others shared in the book. It’s a breath of fresh air to have a book written by a higher education professional told in such a relatable way that is not just sharing statistics, data, and research. So many nuggets of wisdom with my favorite being how the student has to want to be in college at least as much as the parents want this for their child if not more. Thank you to Rebecca Adair for such a great book to help parents and indirectly students alike! Definitely recommended!

This book is beautifully written. I especially loved how the author made it very personal with the many experiences she describes. I think many audiences will benefit by the writing, especially higher education professionals and parents. As a retired VP of Student Affairs and current lecturer, I think this is a must read for graduating high school seniors.

From the Publisher