When You Know What I Know

by Sonja K. Solter

Overview

This harrowing, and ultimately hopeful novel in verse sensitively depicts a girl's journey through the aftermath of abuse.

One day after school, on the couch in the basement, Tori's uncle did something bad. Afterward, Tori tells her mom. Even though telling was a brave thing to do, her mom still doesn't believe her at first. Her grandma still takes his side. And Tori doesn't want anyone else—even her best friend—to know what happened.
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Now Tori finds herself battling mixed emotions—anger, shame, and sadness—as she deals with the trauma. But with the help of her mom, her little sister, her best friend, and others, can Tori find a way to have the last word?

From debut author Sonja K. Solter comes a heartbreaking yet powerful novel that will strike a chord with readers of Jacqueline Woodson and Tony Abbott.  

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780316535410
Publisher:	Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
Publication date:	03/24/2020
Sold by:	Hachette Digital, Inc.
Format:	eBook
File size:	25 MB
Note:	This product may take a few minutes to download.
Age Range:	8 - 12 Years

About the Author

Sonja K. Solter graduated from Stanford University and earned an MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults from Hamline University, with a critical thesis on writing trauma in middle grade and young adult realistic fiction. She is currently a creative writing mentor to youth with the Society of Young Inklings and enjoys writing poetry and prose for children of all ages. When You Know What I Know is her debut novel. Sonja lives with her husband and two children in Louisville, CO.

Editorial Reviews

"Written with leap-off-the page boldness and sensitivity, Sonja K. Solter's When You Know What I Know is as fresh and profound a story of hope in the aftermath of tragedy as I have ever read. Young readers will hang on every word of Tori's confusion, pain, and hard-won renewal. A triumph!"—Tony Abbott, author of The Summer of Owen Todd and The Great Jeff

"Solter emphasizes the emotional effects both of the molestation and of the disparate reactions she encounters when others hear about it. This offering of hope after trauma is, importantly, unromanticized."—Kirkus Reviews

"A difficult but important read, giving a voice to sexual abuse survivors and helping others see the complexity of emotions and the hard work that goes into the healing process."—School Library Journal

"The book is smart."—The Bulletin

"This gentle take on a sensitive subject could be comforting for a child coping with sexual abuse. Debut author Sonja K. Solter made a wise decision in choosing to write When You Know What I Know in verse. The poetry conveys the sense of participating intimately in Tori's inner journey through a difficult experience in her life. The tale is emotionally raw without having to be graphic about the abuse."—Barbara Suanders, Common Sense Media, A+ review

From the Publisher

03/01/2020

Gr 3–7—When you know what Tori knows, you can't look at yourself in the mirror. You can't tell anyone what happened, because you feel embarrassed and ashamed. When Tori finally tells her mother what her uncle did to her in the basement, her mother initially does not believe her. Tori feels simultaneously betrayed and guilty, because Uncle Andy was her babysitter and her mother can't afford another. Tori's mother ultimately believes her, but the sexual abuse permeates every part of the girl's life, impacting her friendships, school, and everything she previously enjoyed. Family dynamics become strained, with her grandmother defending her uncle and her newly remarried father blaming her mother for putting Tori in a dangerous situation. Set just after the abuse, the novel does not specifically describe the experience but focuses instead on the impact and the way others respond. Solter's writing is at its strongest when Tori navigates conflicting emotions. When other survivors of Uncle Andy's abuse come forward, Tori feels validated, then remorseful for feeling glad. The first-person perspective and novel in verse style viscerally convey Tori's raw feelings. The poetry is initially spare, mirroring Tori's emotional state, but it evolves into more expansive verse as Tori processes and begins to heal with the help of a therapist. VERDICT A difficult but important read, giving a voice to sexual abuse survivors and helping others see the complexity of emotions and the hard work that goes into the healing process.—Juliet Morefield, Multnomah County Library, Portland, OR

School Library Journal

2019-11-24
A 10-year-old suffers, endures, rages, and heals after her uncle molests her.

When Tori turned 8, Uncle Andy gave her a hamster. But when she's 10, he sexually abuses her in the basement. The single act happens right before Tori opens the first-person, free-verse narration by telling readers that once you know what she knows, "you can't / not know. / In your face, / under your eyelids." Solter emphasizes the emotional effects both of the molestation and of the disparate reactions she encounters when others hear about it. At first, Mom doesn't believe Tori, compounding Uncle Andy's atrocity and giving Tori a terrifying "whooshing-wave- / of-fire-and-ice-cold" in her body. She hears humming and buzzing inside her head. But her 8-year-old sister is (surprisingly, but believably and vitally) present for her, as is her best friend when Tori—after distancing for a while—steels herself to tell her. Tori's arc is about healing, her free-verse story more a sketch than a fleshed-out deep dive, but it never skirts the big things: emotional suffocation, powerlessness, silence, anger, and recovery. Tori goes from wanting to "shatter" her own face and "dead eyes" to feeling the approaching summer beckon her, "hopeful / that I'll join it / with all of its Maybes." Race is unmentioned; Tori appears white or light skinned on the cover.

This offering of hope after trauma is, importantly, unromanticized. (author's note, resources) (Verse fiction. 8-14)

Kirkus Reviews