Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

In 2017, Aleksandër Eaton is cancelled by an online woke mob. Shortly thereafter, his defenestrators begin mysteriously disappearing. The police bring him in for questioning, but more of these woke warriors continue disappearing while he's in police custody, so the cops have to let him go. Eventually-and entirely inexplicably-it is revealed that 23 members of the mob that cancelled him wind up in a Maersk shipping container together. The sea can is loaded onto a container ship, which is set to depart from Montreal to Jamaica.

Not long after they set sail, a violent storm knocks their container off the ship. It eventually crashes against a sea stack next to a very small island near Bermuda. After exploring the island, they realize they have access to fresh water, but no food-which in turn leads to the realization that, barring rescue, they're destined to resort to cannibalism to stay alive.

One day, one of them discovers-hidden in a (not burning) bush-a robe, as well as two stone tablets upon which are engraved "The Ten Woke Commandments." He is heralded as the island's messiah and, before long, the inhabitants begin murdering each other as commandment after commandment is broken in breathtakingly short order, leading to these deranged cancellation enthusiasts first figuratively then literally eating themselves.

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Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

In 2017, Aleksandër Eaton is cancelled by an online woke mob. Shortly thereafter, his defenestrators begin mysteriously disappearing. The police bring him in for questioning, but more of these woke warriors continue disappearing while he's in police custody, so the cops have to let him go. Eventually-and entirely inexplicably-it is revealed that 23 members of the mob that cancelled him wind up in a Maersk shipping container together. The sea can is loaded onto a container ship, which is set to depart from Montreal to Jamaica.

Not long after they set sail, a violent storm knocks their container off the ship. It eventually crashes against a sea stack next to a very small island near Bermuda. After exploring the island, they realize they have access to fresh water, but no food-which in turn leads to the realization that, barring rescue, they're destined to resort to cannibalism to stay alive.

One day, one of them discovers-hidden in a (not burning) bush-a robe, as well as two stone tablets upon which are engraved "The Ten Woke Commandments." He is heralded as the island's messiah and, before long, the inhabitants begin murdering each other as commandment after commandment is broken in breathtakingly short order, leading to these deranged cancellation enthusiasts first figuratively then literally eating themselves.

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Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

by Aleksandër Eaton
Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

Where There's Smoke, There's Liars: Woke Island Battle Royale

by Aleksandër Eaton

eBook

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Overview

In 2017, Aleksandër Eaton is cancelled by an online woke mob. Shortly thereafter, his defenestrators begin mysteriously disappearing. The police bring him in for questioning, but more of these woke warriors continue disappearing while he's in police custody, so the cops have to let him go. Eventually-and entirely inexplicably-it is revealed that 23 members of the mob that cancelled him wind up in a Maersk shipping container together. The sea can is loaded onto a container ship, which is set to depart from Montreal to Jamaica.

Not long after they set sail, a violent storm knocks their container off the ship. It eventually crashes against a sea stack next to a very small island near Bermuda. After exploring the island, they realize they have access to fresh water, but no food-which in turn leads to the realization that, barring rescue, they're destined to resort to cannibalism to stay alive.

One day, one of them discovers-hidden in a (not burning) bush-a robe, as well as two stone tablets upon which are engraved "The Ten Woke Commandments." He is heralded as the island's messiah and, before long, the inhabitants begin murdering each other as commandment after commandment is broken in breathtakingly short order, leading to these deranged cancellation enthusiasts first figuratively then literally eating themselves.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781778048029
Publisher: Random Mouse
Publication date: 03/01/2022
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: eBook
Pages: 134
File size: 1 MB

About the Author

Aleksandër Eaton is the author of WHERE THERE'S SMOKE, THERE'S LIARS: WOKE ISLAND BATTLE ROYALE. He lives in Marrakech with his dog, Warble.

Table of Contents

Part I: Before the Island

Part II: The Island

Part III: After the Island

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