Publishers Weekly
03/27/2023
Abortion doula Matthews normalizes abortion experiences in her compassionate, affirming debut. She opens by describing her own abortion, including her decision process leading up to it, the medical care she received, and the complex knot of emotions she experienced (of the procedure itself, with her partner and clinic colleagues beside her: “I feel so many frightening, ugly, sharp-edged, hollow things, in these last moments of my pregnancy. But I don’t feel alone”). The author assesses abortion from various perspectives, with mixed results: a strong section positions abortion as a form of “reproductive justice” and highlights the need for readily available “tools of reproductive power,” such as sex education and birth control; elsewhere, a discussion of abortion and sex suggests that “unintended pregnancy is not a weakness or a moral failing” but only superficially asks readers to consider how their sex lives might change if pregnancy choices were met with acceptance. Matthews is at her best when assessing ways to support those considering or recovering from an abortion (food, flowers, or a letter, “even if you’re afraid of being cheesy”) and when she leans into the messy, sometimes-contradictory emotions that often get left out of the abortion discussion. Readers looking to support loved ones or offer themselves grace will find Matthews a wise guide. (May)
Mira Ptacin
You or Someone You Love is a love letter and a balm. It is the book I wish I had in my hands when I was a scared young woman making a decision about my reproductive health—a voice of compassion, understanding, empathy, and empowerment—when the voices surrounding abortion were so condemning. Hannah Matthews is a light worker and a gorgeous writer, and this book is truly a gift. From it I am in awe, full of gratitude and hope.
Rainesford Stauffer
You or Someone You Love is soulful, thoughtful, and profound—a gift to read. The combination of Matthews' personal reflections and gorgeous writing interwoven with heartfelt and urgent conversations and interviews renders this book a guide, a balm, a treasure. I'll return to it many times over.
Jaime Green
You or Someone You Love sings with abundant empathy, generosity, and lyrical prose—I couldn't put it down. It changed how I see not just abortion but everything about how we care for the people we love, for strangers, for our communities. It expanded my heart and my sense of the possibilities of the world, not only through Matthews' knowledge and experience, but through the beauty she's packed into these pages. This is a book full of tenderness, anger, humor, hope, sadness, and delight, a vital and enlivening read.
Booklist (starred review)
Hannah Matthews offers this fierce, beautiful, compassionate book, equal parts memoir and informative nonfiction....comforting readers and building trust with her brave, heartfelt, and gorgeous prose....Readers will leave with much knowledge—and a new role model and friend in Matthews.
Glamour
Morally clear sighted, medically precise, and beautifully lyrical, this book is an accomplishment that belongs on the bookshelf of both the newest and the most seasoned advocates for bodily autonomy...Let Matthews teach you, invite you, and love you with this book.
Koa Beck
A deeply compassionate book set across faiths, gender identity, circumstances, and race. Matthews has warmly reframed a stigmatized procedure as part of holistic healthcare with emotional nuance and reverence.
Meaghan O’Connell
Hannah Matthews imbues You or Someone You Love with humanity and love—for herself, and for everyone we meet in its pages. Matthews has a keen eye trained on the structures and systems that make abortion so much harder than it has to be, and on the rhetoric that tries to flatten a complex and essential part of the human experience. Reading it, I felt so cared for as a mother, a woman, and a person.
author of White Feminism Koa Beck
A deeply compassionate book set across faiths, gender identity, circumstances, and race.”
Kirkus Reviews
★ 2023-04-08
An “abortion care worker” describes an ecosystem of activists working toward reproductive justice.
“Forget the abortion care we need,” writes abortion doula, mother, and clinic worker Matthews. “What is the abortion care we dream of? How can we…sustain that dream care, in our own communities?” In this powerful treatise, the author examines the status of American abortion before and after the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade in 2022. Matthews starts her exploration of reproductive justice—a term coined by women of color that describes the set of conditions necessary for pregnant individuals to be able to both give birth to and raise children in peace and safety—with the story of her own abortion, which required both pills and an “in-clinic procedure” to complete. Using this experience as context, the author introduces readers to her community of abortion care workers, which includes fund providers, who connect individuals who need abortions with the money necessary to do so; herbalists who create homemade abortifacients for communities with little access to clinics or drugs; Muslim and Jewish leaders who consider abortion to be holy; and self-described witches, who create ceremonies to release the pain abortions sometimes cause. Throughout, Matthews strives to center the knowledge and narratives of Black and brown practitioners because they not only bear the brunt of reproductive violence; they also come up with some of the most creative solutions to patriarchy-induced problems. The result is a text that substantially widens our ideas of what abortion does, can, and should look like. The author’s tender voice exudes knowledge and forgiveness, turning a controversial topic into something bordering on cozy. Though the prose is occasionally overwritten, the narrative reflects a refreshing paradigm shift, providing a comprehensive view of abortion in modern America.
A moving, timely vision of what abortion care could become in the U.S.
