Table of Contents
Introduction-I'm suffocating! 1
1 Speed, bonnie boat… 5
2 Giving your mates a hand 17
3 Six barley wines and a Mogadon 34
4 Joining the Priesthood 50
5 Not even a bloody fiver! 64
6 Superman in a fur coat 86
7 The Shirley Bassey leather years 98
8 A whip-round for Marie Osmond 110
9 Mine eyes have seen the glory hole 125
10 By the time I get to Phoenix… 141
11 I love a man in uniform 149
12 Ladies and gentlemen, take your seats! 162
13 This is the one. This is love! 177
14 In the court of the King of Philadelphia 191
15 The smell of cordite 210
16 We should be so lucky! (Lucky, lucky, lucky…) 225
17 I-I-I asked her for a peppermint! 240
18 Loose lips sink ships 260
19 Knocking on Sharon Tate's door 278
20 The Queen and I 301
21 The April Fool that wasn't 321
22 The fire and power of heavy metal 332
Epilogue-Screaming my tits off forever 347
Metal Blessings 357
Song Credits 358
Picture Credits 360